Emotional Impact (Conclusion)

Emotions. We all have them. They are a part of being human.

 

Yet, at the same time, though we all have them, not all of us handle them in the same way. Wouldn't you agree?

 

There's nothing wrong with expressing our emotions - it's a part of being human, remember? We can be overcome with grief, happiness, anger and fear. We may even act "out of control" during those times. But, even at those times it is important to remember to have control over our "out of control" emotions.

 

Make sense?

 

Some "go wild" and do all kinds of things and then use the excuse, "I was overcome with emotion!". Do you remember 1 of the "3 Dangerous Myths to Avoid"? It was, "It's Not My Fault".

 

It's important for us to be sure to control our emotions and not allow our emotions to control us. Easier said than done? Absolutely, at times.

 

This series has not been intended to have us go through like "emotionless"...that's not being "real" and it's not being "human". It also proves nothing and sets no positive example for those around us.

 

Don't be (refuse to be) a thermometer when it comes to emotions. In other words, don't just reflect what the emotions are of those around you. Don't be "one of the crowd" that is controlled or influenced by someone else when it is YOUR responsiblity to maintain a positive attitude and a positive direction for your emotions.

 

I've seen so many people that are grumpy and in a bad mood because of the emotions/attitudes of others around them.

 

SNAP OUT OF IT!

 

YOU be the THERMOSTAT and help "set" the mood...."set" the emotion..."control" the envirmonment (temperature). YOU be the one that helps turn things around to a more positive attitude, mindset and emotion.

 

YOU be the one that, when others leave your presense they don't just "feel" better, they ARE better because of you and your positive attitude, influence and emotion!

 

Be sure to listen to the podcast (see links below) to get the full impact of my thoughts on this and to hear more. And, please, share both the podcast AND the blog with as many as possible.

 

Until next time, friend, whatever you do, be sure to...

 

"Make it an AWESOME day! (Who else is going to do it for you?)"

 

Mike

Future You University    "Like" FYU on Facebook!

Podcast on iTunes    Podcast RSS feed

What Are YOU Creating?

 

How do you feel?

 

Really, how do you feel? Do you feel stressed out all of the time? Are you uptight? Anxious?

 

Is there a feeling of frustration and/or fear prevalent in your life? Are you overwhelmed with the feeling that our world is doomed for destruction?

 

Do you feel peaceful? Relaxed? Do you rest easily and do you rest well?

 

Now then, are you ready?

WHAT TYPE OF THINGS DO YOU POST ON YOUR SOCIAL MEDIA?

 

Are you one that constantly posts or reposts "news" reports of horrible things that happen all around the world? Are you one that constantly posts or reposts videos or articles that lambaste "the other side" from your political viewpoint?

 

Are you one that posts/reposts good, happy, thoughtful graphics and/or videos? Are you one that posts/reposts thoughts and phrases that will encourage and uplift those that read what you post?

 

What are YOU creating?

 

That's right...either way, YOU are "creating" the feelings, emotions and reactions in your life!

 

"What you sow, you will reap" or "You reap what you sow" fits this perfectly and so does "the Law of Attraction".

 

What is referred to as "the Law of Attraction" shares the exact same principle as "sowing and reaping" in that it states the following: That which you send out is what will come back to you. If you send out negativity then, guess what? Negativity will come back to you and fill your life. If you send out positivity then yup, you got it, you life will receive and be filled with that which is positive.

 

This was talked about quite a bit at the training that I attended with Dani Johnson (www.DaniJohnson.com) last weekend. I didn't do a blog or podcast while I was gone and I really wanted to put some thought into what my first article would be once I got back on track.

 

The answer basically "slapped me in the face" when I opened up my Facebook yesterday and noticed - it just jumped out at me - how many "negative" posts filled my page. WOW!

 

Hey, let me be the first to admit that I've joined in on some of this in the past. I've really tried to curtail that and control my participation in that type of activity lately and I think I've done fairly well.

 

THINK ABOUT THIS: Not only does it send a negative feeling/emotion to those that read it/watch it/absorb it but it also puts that same negativity into your own mind and soul.

 

Is that what you really want for you life and is it really what you want to dump on someone else?

 

We can try to justify it all we want but, friend, let's get real - NO ONE NEEDS THAT!

 

All that you have is TODAY ("As long as there is breath, there is hope!").  Why not use today and all of the avenues you have to reach out and touch the lives of others for GOOD? Why not share as much POSITIVE information and as many POSITIVE words to those that you may touch instead of negative sludge?

I've dedicated myself to getting rid of this in my own life. Will you join me? Will YOU determine to stop poisoning YOUR life as well as the life of those with which you come into contact?

What you SOW is what you will REAP and what you SEND OUT is what will COME BACK to you.

I hope that you will share this with as many people as you can and that you'll also listen to the podcast (link below) and also share it with as many as you can.

I also hope that you'll take the time to go to my Future You University page on FB (link below) and leave a comment about this there.

It's time for a change, wouldn't you agree? Then let's start NOW, TODAY.

And as you do so, be sure to...

"Make it an AWESOME day! (Who else is going to do it for you?)"

Mike

Future You University   "Like" FYU on Facebook!   Podcast on iTunes   Podcast RSS feed

                                         Start your home based business HERE

Happy Regardless!

Happy Regardless!

Clouds. Rain. Storms.

Rainbows. Sunshine. Clear skies.

All of these are a part of daily and/or weekly events in our weather. And, we cannot have one without the other and, for most of us, we would not want it to be just "one way" all of the time!

Oh sure, when it's raining for several days in a row the idea of constant sunshine seems really pleasant, doesn't it? But then, when we have a drought and the sun just keeps burning down with no relief in sight we tend to wish, once again, for some of that rain!

That's just the way we are!

When it's bitter cold in the middle of winter we whine and complain about it being TOO cold and then, when it's in the middle of summer we whine and complain that it's TOO hot!

Hey, that's just life, isn't it?

The struggle that we all share when dealing with weather is to learn to be HAPPY REGARDLESS!

Sun or rain - deal with it and have a happy, positive attitude!

Take this example and magnify it ten times or more and you have the situation of us struggling to not base our happiness on people and/or events! Said in a different way - learning to be HAPPY REGARDLESS!

Happy regardless of what people do or say to us.

Happy regardless of who does or doesn't like us.

Happy regardless of whether or not we got that "perfect" job.

Happy regardless of whether or not we got that raise.

Happy regardless of the fact that our air conditioner just went out and it's 110 degrees outside.

Happy regardless of the "storms" that come our way.

Oh, I know that I didn't touch on some really serious struggles that come with the death of someone that we love or tragedy's that come due to accidents or destructive natural events. But please allow what might appear to be a "surface discussion" work it's way deep down into your inner being of hurt. It still applies although, once again, it's easier said than done.

From the Bible we read the apostle Paul describe his dealing with such struggles when he said something along this line: "Ive been through all kinds of things. Good things and a whole lot of bad things. (He even goes on to make a list of all of the bad stuff that has happened to him). But here is what I've learned...whether everything is going great or NOTHING is going even "good", I have learned to be content. Regardless."

Now, that's not an exact quote, but that's the heart of the message.

For us, this can only come when we develop the understanding that happiness - TRUE happiness - must come from within. When I say "true happiness" I'm talking about the kind of happiness that is not at the whim of other people or things. The kind of peace and happiness that comes REGARDLESS of what is going on around me.

THIS IS NOT EASY! But it IS possible! And, again, it is a process.

Why not work on this process beginning today?

Here's a way to begin - pay attention to your attitude and your moods as you go through the day.

Do you allow yourself to get easily "worked up" when something doesn't go the way you wish? If someone doesn't behave the way you think they should do you get angry and resentful toward that person?

What about something as simple as if your favorite television show is not on for some reason - honesty check your attitude at that time.

These are all indicators that we are allowing outside influences to "control" our mood and, yes, even our happiness.

If you're like me you don't like those examples because you can find them all day every day in your own life!

So, simply begin by PAYING ATTENTION and BEING AWARE.

When you find yourself getting these feelings of disappointment, discouragement, frustration and, yes, even anger, stop and think about what is going on. Take a deep breath and say to yourself that you will NOT allow this (whatever it is or whoever it is) to impact your attitude and your happiness in this way.

It's not worth it!

The more you pay attention the more you will find that this happens in your life. DO NOT BECOME DISCOURAGED at this discovery! You are not unusual in this way - many (if not all) of those around you struggle with the exact same thing!

But, the difference with you is this: you now know that it IS something that you can control and you now know HOW and WHAT you can do to begin to get this under control.

It's in your hands and YOU have the control in this area as well as many other areas in your life.

You can do it and you WILL do it IF you make a decision to begin today!

Do it. And AS you do it...

"Make it an AWESOME day! (Who else is going to do it for you?)"

Mike

The Ride of Life

The Ride of Life!

Do you enjoy a roller coaster ride? Yes? No? Here's what I have found - whether you answer "yes" or whether you answer "no", when it comes to roller coasters either answer is given with a lot of emphasis!

People either LOVE or HATE roller coaster rides! I don't know that I've ever met anyone that was neutral on this issue - "Oh, I dunno....I can take it or leave it." - I've NEVER heard that one!

You've heard me talk about the worst part for me -- the "going up" slowly to get ready for that first dramatic drop off. I am afraid of heights and when the roller coaster is making it's climb it is going slow enough for me to notice how high we are getting - I DON'T LIKE THAT PART!

But once we "release" and we began to speed down the track - although my stomach is going nuts - I LOVE IT! Sometimes I'm basically praying out loud, "Please don't break! Please don't break!", I still love the thrill and the excitement of a good roller coaster.

And then, there are those who won't even dare to get on one.

You know where I'm going with this, right? LIFE is a roller coaster ride! There are ups, downs, scary times and exciting times. Times in which we laugh until we almost cry and then there are the times that we just simply cry.

The holiday season is that way for a lot of people. For many with children, it is a WONDERFUL time of the year as the excitement builds and they get to watch the faces of their children on Christmas morning as they see what Santa brought! And, for other parents who are in tough financial shape, this very thought puts a knot in their stomach and they even dread Christmas morning.

For some, this is a wonderful time to share with family and loved ones while there are others that dread this time of the year because a loved one has passed on. I especially ache for those that are experiencing this for the first time and think of how blessed I am that my wife is still with me this holiday season after almost losing her to a heart attack this past August.

Not everyone experiences everything the same - let us all remember that and be aware and sensitive to that and help if and when we can!

This past weekend was a roller coaster of emotions for me. Friday night I got to spend another wonderful evening with some of my high school friends laughing and enjoying each others company. You've heard me talk about this many times before and you've even seen pictures of this posted on this blog. What a wonderful time! Then, on Saturday, we attended the wedding of a young man that was in one of my youth groups when I was a youth minister some years back. To have watched this young man grow up and then see him getting married was a real blessing and one that also brought a lot of joy to us. Two highs two days in a row!

Then, Sunday evening we learned of a young couple that we know that suffered a miscarriage. My wife and I have been through this experience and know the hurt and confusion that goes with this and our hearts ached for them as we cried together for them and also as our own memories came rushing back.

This is life, is it not?

Remember this - when you are laughing and experiencing great joy it is a sign of LIFE! You are alive! And, yes, when your heart is aching and your hurt so badly, this too is a sign of life that you are alive. Sometimes, in the midst of these "down times" we almost wish we weren't alive - but never ever forget that it is an indication that you are, indeed experiencing life - the good and the bad.

And, never forget that, "As long as there is breath there is hope!" Yes, even in the midst of such pain. Yes, even in the darkest of times. There IS hope!

As parents, there have been many times for all of us that we wished (and still do) that we could remove the hurt and pain from the lives of our children --- but we can't. And, really, that's a good thing for our children for they, too, must learn the lessons of life.

It's not always easy for us or them. And, it's sure not easy for us to watch them go through difficult times - but, again - IT IS LIFE and we are on THE RIDE OF LIFE!

One final thought - those of us that have experienced things that we see others experiencing for perhaps, the first time, have an excellent opportunity to share our lives with those that are hurting and/or confused. We are proof that these things ARE able to be survived and that life does, indeed, keep going.

So, friend, buckle that seat belt - or make sure that harness is over your shoulders and clicked in place and then...hang on for this ride that we are on - THE RIDE OF LIFE!

And, all along the way, be sure to...

"Make it an AWESOME day! (Who else is going to do it for you?)"

Mike

Where's My Happy Ending?

I like happy endings. Don't you?

That being said - I DON'T like movies with sad endings.

I hate them.

I mentioned in today's podcast a movie that I saw when I was in college. That just came to me as I was recording the podcast and now, I've been able to do a little more research and find out some of the missing details. The name of the movie was "The Champ" (I got that right!) and it came out in 1979 (I was right in the time frame too!). It starred Jon Voight, Faye Dunaway and Ricky Schroder (at a very young age). You can "google" the phrase, "movie The Champ" and you can even watch a clip that is almost 10 minutes long of this heart-wrenching scene in which the boxer (Voit) is knocked out in the ring and dies in the dressing room while his little boy (Schroder) screams at him to wake up. One of the saddest endings to a movie I've ever scene - and I hated it!

((Correction - I went back and watched this clip after typing this article, and the movie is even sadder than I remember. Here's the correction - the Champ did NOT get knocked out - he actually won the fight - HAPPY ENDING - and then dies in the dressing room with his little boy at his side as described above. This even emphasizes in a more powerful way my thoughts on the ups and downs we go through in our lives!))

I didn't mention this one, but I remember sobbing my eyes out when I was a kid at the end of the movie, "Old Yeller". Do you remember that one?

So, again, I HATE SAD ENDINGS to movies!

And yes, I watched another movie yesterday that had one of these sad endings - "Marley & Me". Have you seen it? If you haven't, then skip this blog because I am going to give away the ending.

The thing is - when I first saw this movie advertised before it's release in theaters, I already knew what the ending would be. I didn't know the HOW, but I knew what would happen. I just had a feeling about it.

And sure enough - I was right....the dog (Marley) dies. And, yes, I had tears streaming down my face. You see, I LOVE DOGS and I especially LOVE Labrador Retrievers. I've had several!

My first one was right after I got married in 1982 and his name was "Champ". He was the runt of the litter (just like Marley) and he was a wonderful dog. Our next one was "Sugar", a female who was also a wonderful dog and was so good with our kids, just as Champ was - that's just the way "Labs" are! When I recorded the podcast I left one of my Labs out - "Studley"! That's right, that is what his name was and he lived up to the name when he was a pup. He was tragically killed after we only had him for about a month - but he was a special dog. Then there was "Rocky" who was a MASSIVE dog when he was full grown and finally there was "Smokey".

You don't have to be a dog lover to enjoy that movie and to be moved to tears. If you love ANY animal, you will be touched by this story.

But, after watching the movie, I told my wife, "I would have much rather preferred for that movie to have a happy ending!"

Life is that way isn't it? Things don't go the way we had planned and we may scream at the top of our voice, "WHERE'S MY HAPPY ENDING?"

Perhaps it is a marriage that went bad.
Perhaps it is a job that was lost.
Perhaps it is the death of a loved one.
Perhaps it is your own failing health.

Whatever it may be - I do believe we can all relate to this idea.

If you had the ability, how would you script your life? How would you script the ending?

This is a fairly difficult topic to discuss because while there are many things in our life that we CANNOT control, there are also many things in our life that we CAN (and should) control!

One example I gave in the podcast was that of my wife's heart attack. I had no control over that happening - it was out of my control! However, it did turn out with a happy ending (thank you, Lord!) and she is still with me. Here's the thing - I DO have control over what I do with my time with her now. I've been given more time with her and now I am more committed than ever to take advantage of each and every day with her - THAT is within my control.

It is also within my control to allow that incident to impact my life in other ways and with other people.

Now, I'll be honest with you. If it had not turned out this way - if she had died - I do not know what I would have done. You see, I'll be the first one to acknowledge that it is easy for me to say these things - and yes, I believe them and attempt to live them every day - and I know it would be hard to keep my focus on them in such a difficult time.

But, I do know this - I have my "positive thoughts bank" continuously restocked and I believe that this would, indeed, come to play in such a tragic event.

There are things we CAN control and there are things we CANNOT control so here is the question for us to consider over the next few days:
- What will we/you do in response to the things that you cannot control?
- What will we/you do with those things that we can control?

Life doesn't always have happy endings as much as we wish otherwise. But we can still have some control as to the impact and our response.

Be thinking about that as we continue these thoughts in my next podcast and blog and...until then...

"Make it an AWESOME day! (Who else is going to do it for you?)"

Mike