8th of 8 Things to Give Up

Thank you for staying with me through this series on things that we all need to give up. I know that, for many of you, this has not been an easy series to go through and, I also know that others have simply dismissed this whole thing with criticism.

 

How do I know these things? Because PEOPLE are reading this and, that being said, PEOPLE are not that hard to "read" and figure out! Some see the issue and understand that it is something that they need to overcome and give up. They struggle and don't like to admit that this is true in and for their lives, BUT they realize the need to give it up and begin to work toward doing so. And, as I mentioned at the start of this series, there are those of you that have used your "criticism" as an EXCUSE as to why you won't give these things up in your life. Some of you aren't willing to accept this as a reality in your life and, that being so, you refuse to take action since you refuse to accept this as a problem.

 

Let's go ahead and get something else out here at the start, shall we?

 

People pleaser's (those who constantly try to please everyone else) are the result of all of the other things that we have already discussed in this series. Think about it: If you struggle with the first seven things on this list then, the odds are, you are also a "people pleaser".

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When you doubt and criticize yourself in the ways already listed, you begin to find your "identity" in pleasing other people. To some extent, you have no real value on your own...it's what you can do for others that becomes "who you are". 

 

You become a chameleon...changing and adapting to be whatever/whoever someone else wants or needs you to be for them. And, when you have done this so many times, you begin to forget who YOU really are.

 

Once you begin to give these other seven things up in your life, you begin to discover that who YOU are matters. You realize that, although "getting along" with others is a good thing, the most important thing is to "BE" YOU and allow YOU to flourish and show through in every thing that you do. At that point, if others like it and like you - GREAT! If not, then, so what?

 

YOU CAN'T PLEASE EVERYONE!

 

I have a close friend that has always been a "people pleaser". From what I have learned from them, they learned this tactic early in their life and they still struggle with it today. The tactic? They learned that, basically, you do what everyone else wants and they are happy. The problem? My friend's own likes or dislikes didn't matter and, after a while they began to realize that they were not living THEIR life...they were living the lives of everyone else.  As a matter of fact, even in their dealings with me, I have helped them discover that many answers they give are NOT their answers. What do I mean by that? They give answers - even to me - that are answers that they think I want to hear.

 

Can you relate to that at all? If so, you are a people pleaser and you need to give this up as soon as possible. This, like the others, is not easy but - one day at a time and with determination - it CAN be done.

 

Here's a bit of encouragement: When you start giving up these things (notice I didn't say when you have accomplished it all but, instead, when you START) you will find that you begin to believe in yourself. When you begin to believe in yourself, you become confident and not as concerned with getting approval from everyone else. You will also find that people like and respect YOU for being YOU and, in return, the need to please everyone else will begin to disappear.

 

Believe me, it's true.

 

I hope you have enjoyed this series but, even more importantly, I hope this series has been helpful in getting you to give up things on this list that you need to give up once and for all.

 

Until next time, always be sure to...

 

"Make it an AWESOME day! (Who else is going to do it for you?)"

 

Mike

Future You University    "Like" FYU on Facebook!    Podcast on iTunes

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1 of 8 Things to Give Up

I will share the complete graphic of this once we have completed the series so that you can have it for yourself but, for now, I'm only going to reveal them one at a time as they are discussed.

We are just a couple of month away from that time of the year when so many people declare their "New Year's Resolutions" which, as we all know, usually don't go much further than a month or so of effort.

A majority of these "resolutions" involve something that the particular person resolves to "give up" in order to get the results that they seek. Perhaps they give up certain foods in order to lose weight. Perhaps they give up drinking as much alcohol as they have been doing. Perhaps they decide to give up poor spending habits in order to reach some financial goals. The list could go on and on.

Why not get started EARLY with a list of things - 8 things - to give up that will, indeed, improve your life and your relationships?

I don't think these are in any particular order of importance, but, in the order of their appearance on this graphic of "8 Things to Give Up:"

#1. DOUBTING YOURSELF

On many of these eight entries, one thing we can do is to simply take a look at the "opposite" side/view. So, with this first listing, "BELIEVE IN YOURSELF!"

I've shared a graphic before that said something along the lines of: "If you are going to doubt anything, doubt your limits!" Turn it around and approach this from a POSITIVE view.

Many times this issue comes from a lifetime of a person being constantly bombarded with "doubt thoughts" by parents, classmates, other family members as well as possible other people in their life.

When this has been a part of someones life, it does become difficult to think any other way. It becomes difficult to think that, what you have been told all of your life, is NOT true.

Even though I said that this was not in any particular of importance, this may actually be THE most important thing that must be done in order to have any sort of change in your life. This may be the BIGGEST obstacle to overcome in order to move forward with a more positive attitude about yourself and those around you.

I hadn't planned to do this but, with these thoughts in mind, I want to share (once again) with you my "7 Daily Affirmations" that I put together several years ago. Click on it, save it, print it off or whatever you need to do so that you can SEE it and VOCALIZE it - yes, say it out loud! - for your own life.

Yes, this is "easier said than done". But, friend, think about this:

"ANY THING that requires ACTION and that involves CHANGE will ALWAYS be 'easier said than done'. But remember, change comes not by what has been SAID but by what has been DONE!"

 

Think about these things and incorporate the "7 Daily Affirmations" into your life and also be sure to join me for the next  part of the listing of things we all need to give up.

 

Until then, whatever you do, be sure to...

 

"Make it an AWESOME day! (Who else is going to do it for you?)"

 

Mike

Future You University  "Like" FYU on Facebook!  Podcast on iTunes 

Podcast RSS feed    4 "no cost or low cost" start ups!

 



 

Let It Go

It's hard to let go of things to which we have grown accustomed.

 

Think about it and you will realize that you can easily apply this to many things. Let me go ahead and mention a few - you may want to make a list of all of the ones that you come up with and see if there is a need to rid your life of any of these.

 

Bad habits are hard to rid our lives of due to the fact that we have grown accustomed to them. This goes back to last week's podcast/blog that talked about things that we allow will continue in our lives.

 

Bad habits, such as poor eating habits, not exercising, having a negative attitude, listening to and participating in gossip, not giving it our all at the workplace, not giving it our all in our relationships, a lack of self-discipline - these are but a few of some bad habits that can make a "nest" in our lives.

 

And they will stay there as long as we allow them to do so.

 

You have likely seen this quote before: "The best way to break a habit is to drop it."

 

Easier said than done? ABSOLUTELY! But that does NOT mean that it's something we should avoid.

 

Hey, listen, I understand that it's hard to rid our lives of those "comfort foods" if one is wanting to lose weight but, at the same time, it is an absolute NECESSITY to just let them go - rid your life of them - IF you want to have any success at all in losing weight.

 

We often try to hang on to these things (whatever they may be in your life) while trying to figure out how to still allow them in our lives and still have progression or improvement of our lives.

 

But sometimes, you just have to let it go and walk away.

 

And, yes friend, sometimes that includes people.

 

This is likely the HARDEST situation to deal with and the HARDEST from which to walk away and let go. But sometimes it is necessary.

 

I'm not talking about a hasty decision and I'm not taking this lightly or talking about giving yourself an easy "out" so that you can allow inappropriate actions into your life.

 

There is so much I could say here that would apply. I do want to encourage you to listen to the podcast with this (see links below) and I may even continue this further in the next article and podcast.

 

Do the work in spending time diligently taking inventory of your life. What (or who) are you allowing in your life that you need to simply "let go"?

 

It's not always easy. That's why I share these thoughts with you, for you. We all need a little encouragement along the way.

 

Right?

 

And, as you continue along this journey of life, be sure to...

 

"Make it an AWESOME day! (Who else is going to do it for you?)"

 

Mike

Future You University     "Like" FYU on Facebook!     Podcast on iTunes     Podcast RSS feed

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