Showing posts with label better relationships. Show all posts
Showing posts with label better relationships. Show all posts

Wednesday, February 14, 2024

WHAT Do YOU Love? (Do You Even Know???)

Click HERE for the PODCAST

Click HERE for the VIDEO

 As I type out this article, it is February 14th...VALENTINE'S DAY...the day that celebrates LOVE.

With that in mind, I have a very important question for you: "WHAT Do YOU Love?" Notice that I did not ask "WHO Do You Love" even though that question also needs to be answered based on what we will discuss today.

WHAT Do You Love? WHAT is your PASSION?

You have heard it asked this way before, I'm sure: "What would you do even if you didn't get paid for it?" or "What would you even do for free?"

A lot of people will SAY that they love someone or something but their actions betray their declaration.

People will declare before a minister and all of the people in attendance that they will love each other "no matter what" (to sum it up) yet, many of those same people will end up not living up to those declarations and will end up divorcing one another.  

MANY will say that something is the MOST IMPORTANT thing in their life yet, again, their ACTIONS say otherwise. 

What about YOU

What do you say that you love and what do you say is most important to you?

Be honest with yourself and then answer the question of what your actions say/show about whatever it is. 

I will discuss this topic in more detail a little later BUT FIRST, I NEED SOMETHING FROM YOU!

I need YOUR input on what YOUR passion is, WHAT are you willing to do in order to obtain that "thing" and WHY is it so important to you? I'm not going to ask you to tell me what your actions actually say on that part...I'll leave that up to you to discuss with yourself.

I really want to get this from you and use it for my future thoughts on this topic. You don't have to tell me your name or anything like that so that you can remain anonymous BUT PLEASE share this information with me by either leaving a comment on this article OR by sending it to me via email at mike@FutureYouUniversity.com

Thanks, in advance, for your participation and, until next time...


#FutureYouUniversity  #MikeSpillman #Success  #PsitiveMdset  #PersonalDevelopment


Saturday, January 20, 2024

Postive Mindset 101 (Part 4): The MIND Field of RELATIONSHIPS

 

Have you read the previous articles in this series? If not, you won't be successful in your desire (IF you have the desire) to actually develop a positive mindset.

Have you listened to the podcast and/or watched the videos that go along with each of these articles in this series? If not, why not? I don't follow a script so, EACH ONE OF THESE avenues for each episode will always have some additional/different information that you won't find in the other avenues. TRUE FACT!

ARE YOU DOING THE HOMEWORK that is discussed? Again, if not - WHY NOT? Are you SERIOUS about learning how to DEVELOP (and MAINTAIN) a positive mindset or is this just a "half-hearted" approach that likely is reflective of your yearly shortcomings with "New Year's Resolutions"?

In this part of this series, I'm first talking about those relationships that you have that are, for the most part, by choice. Your friends (your closest friends to other friends that aren't as close) and anyone else that you have "connections" with NOT INCLUDING those that you have through work or that are what I refer to as "FORCED Relationships". 

Now then, you may even include the relationships that you have with family in this first application. Oh, I know that you might argue that your relationship with family is not by choice. I get that and, honestly, the category of "family" will be applied in THIS part as well as in the next when I discuss those "Forced Relationships". 

O.k.? Got it? (Again, be sure to listen to the podcast and/or watch the video - links below - which may help you "grasp" this even better).

Here's your "homework"...

1. For now, just brainstorm and write down anyone that you can think of when you consider those relationships that you have that are by YOUR choice. Again, those closest to you and even those that aren't as close but with which you still choose to connect. Yes, go ahead and enter any family members that, as best as you can, you would say that you "choose" to spend time around.  Go ahead...write them all down and get specific by actually writing down their name.

2. As you look at the list that you just put together (obviously, don't move to this step until you have completed step #1...yes, you can add others later as you think of them and adjust each of these things as necessary) I want you to rate them from 1 - 10. This means that "1" would be the low end of helping you have a positive mindset. "10" would be on the high end. So, for example, someone that you would rate as a "1" would be someone that has an absolute NEGATIVE influence on your life...the WORST! And, on the other end, a "10" would be someone that "lifts you up" and makes you just "feel good/better" just by being around them. Rate each person on this part of this list based on the scale that I just defined.

3. Once you have completed step #2, now take the time to write down WHY you gave each person the ranking that you did. If you ranked someone at a "6", write WHY you did so. Be specific as possible. 

4. Pay close attention to these last two steps! NEXT, besides each name and ranking, try to estimate how much TIME you spend with them on a weekly basis (estimate how much each day you spend and then add them up for seven days).

5. Finally, it's time to "sort them out" and I want you to do this TWO DIFFERENT WAYS:                      

    a.) Group them by "ranking". In other words, group all of your 7's together and, put all of your 4's, etc. in a different grouping together. Got it?                                                                                                           

     b.) NOW make another LIST based on the amount of time that you spend with each person in a week. The first on your list should be the one that you spend the MOST time with and on down to where the last one on your list should be the one that you spend the LEAST amount of time with. (Yes, be sure to include time that you spend on the phone, chatting via text or social media, etc.) ALSO, beside each name and the amount of time that you sped with them, be sure to also list their "ranking number" that you gave them. 

 Here's a couple of examples:



 That's it for now. You SHOULD be able to start seeing what I'm doing here and that YOU are going to have to make some DECISIONS on who you are allowing into your life based on their impact on your mindset - positive OR negative!

Based on how much TIME you spend with the people on your list, how healthy is it  - based on their "ranking" - for you to spend that much time with them?

Based on their "ranking", how healthy is it for you to spend any more time than absolutely necessary with them?

Don't stress yourself out over this right now. But, again, if you are SERIOUS about your desire (DECISION) to develop a POSITIVE MINDSET, then you can see for yourself - clearly - that there may be some changes that are going to need to take place.

For now...just take a look at the list and be honest with yourself at what you actually see. Yes, this WILL test your "resolve" (root word of "resolution", remember?) on this decision. 

In our next article, we'll take a look at those "forced relationships" that we must all deal with, perhaps on a daily basis.

Until then, whatever you do...
 

#FutureYouUniversity  #MikeSpillman #Success  #PsitiveMdset  #PersonalDevelopment


Tuesday, January 16, 2024

Positive Mindset (Part 3): MISS THIS and FAIL 100% of the Time!



 As always, if you haven't had the chance to read the previous article (contains Part 1 & 2), be sure to do so before you read today's article. Go ahead...I'll wait. Go on...really...I'll still be here. 

Now, before we move on with the need to seek out other "MIND Fields" in our life experience, we need to understand something that is of UTMOST IMPORTANCE! I'm 100% serious about this fact: If you miss this or ignore this, you WILL FAIL in your desire to improve your mindset. 
THAT - IS - A - FACT! 
 
 Do I have your attention? Yes, it IS that serious and important.
 

 
 
What is this "all-important" thing that must be done? I call it "R & R" (and, no, I'm not talking about Rest & Relaxation) which stands for REMOVE and REPLACE
 
You must REMOVE those things that bring a negative influence into your life and REPLACE them with things that bring a POSITIVE influence into your life.

Let's use an example of someone that has decided that they want to lose weight and develop healthier eating habits. What is one thing - besides CHANGING THEIR DIET - that they must do? 

Well, as part of the process of changing their diet is the process of REMOVING those things that would be tempting to their old way of eating. They must not only REMOVE those things (colas, sweets, chips, etc.) but they must also REPLACE them with healthier choices! (Be sure to listen to the podcast and/or watch the video on this - I get into much more detail than I will go into in this blog article).
 
In the same way, what we are talking about is another type of "diet". It's the diet (what you "consume") that you allow into your mind and thus, your mindset.
 
If you did your "homework" that was talked about in the last article/podcast/video, then you have identified SEVERAL things in your "home surroundings" that are definitely "hidden mines" in your "MIND Field" that can cause severe injury and/or death to your pursuit of developing a positive mindset.
 
Your next step is to now thing about things that you can do to REMOVE the negative mines with POSITIVE life-giving items. What can you do to REMOVE the negative influence on social media and REPLACE it with some sort of POSITIVE influence? 
 
For one, don't spend as much time there...that's a fact that you must understand. Why? Because, especially at the beginning, it is TOO TEMPTING to spend much time there. Like someone that is trying to lose that weight and still allowing that bag of cookies to be setting out on the counter for them to see on a constant basis. You need to REMOVE that temptation! There are a LOT of people/pages that you can follow on social media that will have a much more positive impact on your mindset and life.
 
YES, I AM ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE! If you've not done so, you need to go to my FaceBook page by going to www.FutureYouUniversity.com and you need to plan to be there every day! I post something every day that is positive and helpful for ANYONE that is trying to improve their mindset in a positive way.  Make it a habit to listen to each and every podcast that I put out and see if it doesn't help with your mindset.

Go through your list of those "Mind Fields" and take the time to go through them and figure out a "healthier" alternative for your "mindset diet".  If you need some help, reach out and let me know...I'll be happy to give you some good suggestions.
 
Main question: How important is this for you? How serious are you about actually making this CHANGE for a better life and future? It's like the example of someone saying that they want to lose weight...if they still keep doing the same thing that they've done in the past, nothing will change and their health will NOT improve. 
 
Do you want to improve your "odds" for success with this process? ENGAGE with me by leaving a comment here, below the video and/or on my FB page that I shared earlier.  It helps to be connected to someone that will help you and encourage you along the way...I'm here for you!

Join me next time as we DO begin to discuss the "Mind Field" that comes in the area of our RELATIONSHIPS. 

And, until then, whatever you do...
 

#FutureYouUniversity  #MikeSpillman #Success  #PsitiveMdset  #PersonalDevelopment


Thursday, January 11, 2024

POSITIVE MINDSET 101 (The Importance of a POSITIVE Mindset)

 

Be sure to listen to the podcast/watch the video on each one of these topics in this series. You can find the links to them down below.

Some people wonder WHY having a positive mindset matters. As a matter of fact, while doing a recent search on questions that people are asking in this area, that very question came up just about more than any other. WHY does it matter and WHAT DIFFERENCE can it make in a person's life?

Although there's not a "Webster-type" definition of POSITIVE MINDSET since it's two words, I did find some suggested "definitions/descriptions" for it. 

Here's one: "The practice of focusing on the GOOD in ANY given situation." And another: "You are OPTIMISTIC about the world around you, and you EXPECT that good things will happen to you." 

You may even remember the late Dr. Norman Vincent Peale using the acrostic, "PMA" which stands for Positive Mental Attitude. That's what we are talking about.

For example, you may have seen or been around someone that just seems to ALWAYS be happy and, that being the case, they spread "joy and happiness" wherever they go! And, at the same time, you've seen people that are just the opposite. Oh, they spread joy and happiness alright, but it's usually when they LEAVE a room!

Which do you want to be? Which do you think describes YOU at this point in your life?

I will do all I can to help you understand the absolute NECESSITY in developing (and MAINTAINING) and positive mindset, but you have to DECIDE - first and foremost - that you actually seek/want that for your life.

Let me just go ahead and tell you: Your life will IMPROVE for the better in EVERY area of your life by dong so...developing and learning to maintain a positive mindset. That's not an over-statement, friend. It is an absolute FACT!

 Let's break that down and look at some definitions. First of all, the word DECIDE: "come to a resolution in the mind as a result of consideration". Let's break it down even more and look at the word, RESOLUTION: "a firm decision to do or not do something". And then the word, CONSIDERATION: "careful thought, typically over a period of time".

Do you want to know why most people fall short on their "New Year's Resolutions"? It's because they don't fully understand the meaning of the word, "RESOLUTION". Look at it. It's a FIRM decision to either do something (start walking and cutting back on fast food, for example) or NOT do something (stop sitting on the couch eating a bag of chips).  And, it is something that involves CAREFUL THOUGHT, typically over a period of time. In other words, it is not a "half-way" and "off the cuff" thought...it is a FIRM decision!

Even if you don't complete understand this whole thing of "personal development" and "positive mindset", you CAN (and MUST) make a decision to improve your life (and attitude) if, indeed, you desire to actually IMPROVE your life - in ALL areas of your life.  

This is the FIRST and MOST IMPORTANT step! (Let's continue with the next part of this series)...


Part 2: Beware the Mine (MIND) Field

You are likely aware of "land mines" that are hidden in/on the ground with the idea of someone stepping on one and it blowing up causing great injury or death. They are usually connected to those involved in a war but, even at that, there are many times that innocent people (those that have nothing to do with the war) are injured or even killed.

In our discussion of developing and maintaining a POSITIVE MINDSET, I would rename this as a "MIND Field". Think of it as "hidden dangers" that can cause serious injury or even "death" to a person's positive mindset and desire to maintain such a mindset. These are things that can "cause" or "add to" a NEGATIVE mindset and, friend, they are EVERY where (as you will begin to discover in today's episode).

A few weeks ago I did a podcast/video on the topic, "You CAN NOT Change!" (for some reason, I did not do a blog article but you can go to the podcast link and the YouTube link and find it easily). The point of that episode was that you truly CAN NOT change if you approach life with the same old mindset! 

Now, don't miss this point: Your mindset - even if negative - DEFINITELY has an impact on your life (EVERY area of your life). It is simply not a mindset that will bring about positive change and a better future. Get the point yet?

Take a look at this quote by Claude Diamond:


 CHANGE takes time and, usually, it is not easy. That's just the way it is and you need to be aware of that.

Now, let's get to some SPECIFICS and take a look at some things IN YOUR OWN LIVING SPACE that may be "MIND FIELDS" in your own home. Are you ready? Take notes and add your own thoughts to this list.

1. Television: It doesn't matter if you are watching something "live" or if you are watching/steaming movies, etc. A couple of things that you need to do with this...First, actually "log" your time of how much time you spend watching t.v in all forms. I suggest doing this over a period of at least 3 days. Perhaps a day or two during the week (after you get home from your job, for example) AND also over the weekend when you likely spend more time doing so. Don't just log in how much TIME but WHAT the content is of what you allow into your mind/mindset through this avenue. What kind of shows are you watching...what kind of content are you allowing into your mindset? Be HONEST and be SPECIFIC.

2. Music: Yes, we must also log the same information in connection to the music that we listen to on a daily basis. After all, THIS ALSO "feeds" our mind - either positive or negative. Sure, I get it. There is some music that the beat just lifts you up but, what about the message? Again, be HONEST and be SPECIFIC on this one as well. It's kind of like someone trying to lose weight that are having a hard time giving up that ice cream that they are used to having as a "treat" every night. Remember, you must make a FIRM DECISION in what you want. And then...you must ACT UPON that decision.

3. Social Media: (Play ominous music here!) Here's where it may get really tough for you. But, again, follow the same formula for logging your time/content as mentioned above and - once again - you MUST be HONEST and SPECIFIC in order for you to actually understand the impact of these "Mind Fields" in your own home. Who do you "follow" and what kind of content do they share that you "consume"? Is it positive or negative? What about your own posts? Are they full of negative content (griping, complaining, etc.) or are they posts that actually can "lift" or "encourage" those that read?

4. Texting: Most of you probably don't talk on the phone as much as you text. Well, you know the drill by now, right? This one is easy to track unless you delete your texts right away. Go back and take a look (remember, HONEST and SPECIFIC) when you log this information. 

5. What You READ: I don't know how much you read or what avenue you use for your reading. Perhaps you read an actual, physical book or you do so on your phone via an app or even listen to an "audio book".  Just like all of the rest listed above, LOG THE INFORMATION to determine how MUCH information you allow into your mind in this way as well as WHAT TYPE OF CONTENT you allow into your mind. Do I need to say it again? Be HONEST and SPECIFIC if you truly want to make improvement.  

My guess is that you will be SURPRISED at how much TIME you spend consuming this information into you mind/mindset as well as "what kind" of information you are allowing into your mind.

So, PART 1 of your homework is to go through each one of these that I listed and take the time to "log" the time and content as I suggested. Total each category up (perhaps even get an "average" after logging it over a period of several days) and then take a long look at your information that you've gathered.

PART 2 of your homework is to take a look around YOUR surroundings and ADD anything to the list that I may not have covered. Just as you would not want anyone who has the responsibility of discovering and removing actual mines in a mine field to do a "half-way" job and then tell you to walk on through, neither should you desire to approach this task in the same way. IT IS OF UTMOST IMPORTANCE in this process!

I would LOVE to hear some of your findings. You can either leave a comment here OR go to my website/Facebook page: www.FutureYouUniversity.com  and leave your comment until the information about this blog article or one of the ones featuring the podcasts and/or video. 

What's next?

In our next article/episode we will look at what we must do once we begin REMOVING these "mines" from our "MIND Field" and what comes next in that process.

We will also begin to look at another area full of those dangerous "MIND Fields" and begin to talk about our RELATIONSHIPS.

Until next time, whatever you do, always be sure to...
 
Make it an AWESOME day - who else is going to do it for you?

 


Monday, January 1, 2024

My Current Read = RECOMMENDED!

I wanted to share a book that I am currently reading that is helping to prepare my mindset for a MAJOR MOVE FORWARD in this new year.

I'm not going to write a review because you can actually go to the link listed below and listen to a part of this book for FREE without even signing up. 

But, at the same time, why would you NOT go ahead and sign up for a FREE TRIAL so that you can actually listen to the WHOLE BOOK?

We all have OPPORTUNITIES that come our way and, for whatever reason, we often let those opportunities turn into MISSED OPPORTUNITIES.

You have absolutely NOTHING to lose and EVERYTHING to gain by taking the time to listen to this incredibly challenging book.

You can get a FREE trial and listen to this book at audible.com by clicking on this link:

 https://www.audible.com/pd/10x-Is-Easier-than-2x-Audiobook/B0C2J8VZZ3?action_code=ASSGB149080119000H&share_location=pdp

 

I'd love to read your comments about the book once you've listened to it...I hope you are challenged and PUSHED FORWARD as I am.

 

Until next time...

Whatever you do, always be sure to make it an AWESOME day - who else is going to do it for you?

Mike