Choose Wisely

"Make wise choices today!"

 

This was a daily encouragement that I would say as young men and women would pile out of the van or bus I was driving while working with a group of kids that were in foster care.

 

Did they always listen? Apparently not.

 

Have YOU always made wise choices. That one is easy - NO!

 

And, many times, we feel the sting and consequences of those poor choices. Some, obviously, are bigger than others but they ALL have consequences.

I've said it this way many times before: "What you do TODAY matters!"

My guess is that most - if not all - of us cried out, "I want to make my own decisions!" at some point in time while we were teens and living at home. A home, might I add, that we likely had nothing to do with providing, that likely included a place to sleep, shower, use the bathroom - INDOORS - and even had food to eat! Again, we likely had very little to do with any of that. Yet, we didn't want to abide by "their" rules...we wanted the freedom to make our own choices!

Sometimes it would be nice to not have to make so many choices again, wouldn't it? Sometimes we find that it would be quite nice to have someone else make the decisions for us. But, friend, it's just not that way anymore!

Some are still feeling the effects of poor choices and it continues on for years when it involves and includes children that, out of no fault of their own, become a part of those poor choices.

Let's get to the bottom line here: Although we cannot go back and undo those poor choices we CAN make better choices today that can do a couple of things -
     1. Better choices can bring about a process of healing that may be needed due to past poor choices.
     2. Better choices today can prevent us from making those same mistakes again!

Stop living in the past - that, alone, is a poor choice!

Live TODAY and make the best choices possible by putting thought - CLEAR thought - into the process. Yeah, you and I BOTH are capable of doing that, friend!

"As long as there is breath, there is hope!" -- I came up with that several years ago and it still applies today. TODAY you are alive and breathing. That means that TODAY you have the chance, the HOPE of making things better and making wiser choices!

So, get on with it. And, as you do so, be sure to...

"Make it an AWESOME day! (Who else is going to do it for you?)"

Mike

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CHANGES: I Screwed Up!

CHANGES: I SCREWED UP!!

Now, hopefully you're really familiar with F.Y.U (Future You University) but I hope you're not TOO familiar with I.S.U. (I Screwed Up!).

But, let's face it, since we are all human we ALL spend time trying to deal with the consequences that come when we screw up, right?

Before I get too far into the discussion for today, let's take a look at the four types of changes that we face in our lives:

TYPES OF CHANGES: (1)Those we voluntarily bring on ourselves... (2) those that we have no choice in but are not "against" us (change of seasons, life changes due to age, etc.)... (3)those that come at us DUE TO our actions and (4) those that come to us 100% involuntarily and at no fault of our own.

If you haven't gone back and read the articles on the first two (and/or listened to the podcasts that go with them) then you might want to do that first to catch up with the discussion so far.

So, for today, we are going to talk about the 3rd category listed above: Those changes that come our way due to our own actions. In other words, changes that come when we SCREW UP!

Here's the deal even with this: too many people still try to blame other people or other circumstances for their own screw ups and won't take the action necessary to accept the blame, do what can be done to correct the mess and then move on!

Does that describe you? (*OUCH!*)

Hey, let's face it...it's hard to ADMIT it when we suffer or those connected to us (spouse, children, friends, etc.) suffer due to our own screw ups! Seriously, who wants to admit to that?

But, it's necessary for us to wake up and realize that we have made a big mistake so that we can hopefully learn from it and avoid that same mistake in the future.

Have you noticed that those that fail to do this seem to keep making the same dumb mistakes over and over again?

Again, does that describe you?

If it does, DO soemthing about it and LEARN as you move forward.

Hey, let's face this fact too...sometimes we just make a wrong decision and we suffer CHANGES that aren't good for us or those that are around us. It's not necessarily a pattern in our lives but, nonetheless, it causes some problems, right?

Maybe you pulled your family up from where you lived and moved them across the country for a new job that you thought would be best for all of you and it turns out that it was, actually, a very poor decision.

This ties in closely with our last topic about those changes that come due to our voluntarily actions but, yet, it's a little different because, at times (unlike that last example) these changes come due to our stupidity.

A bit blunt, huh?

Sometimes an inablility to control our temper and/or our tongue results in changes due to that inability. Maybe you told your boss off and got fired. Now what?

Do that type of thing too many times and you will find it harder and harder to get hired by anyone!

I was talking to someone not too long ago that was complaining about their current situation so I asked them what their "ideal situation" would be. They described it to me and then said, "But I know that will never happen." When I asked them why they would say that here was their response: "Because of all of the stupid stuff that I keep on doing!"

Thing is, during the time period that I was having this discussion with this person they were still doing some of the same stupid stuff that was keeping them from their "ideal situation".

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

So, let's get on to thinking about some sort of solution to this mess. How does that sound?

FIRST, if you fit the type of scenario like the last guy I talked about then you MUST decide what is more important in your life....keeping on doing what you are doing and getting the same results OR starting to CHANGE your life so that you can IMPROVE your life. As you've heard many times before the very definition of insanity is to keep doing the same things over and over again and to expect different results.

Part of this solution is to begin to discipline yourself... your temper, your tongue, your attitude, etc. Only you can do it but this type of infomation and other positive information can help you in this endeavor.

SECONDLY, if you are suffering through change due to a misinformed decision then, most importanlty, admit that mistake - no matter how hard it is to do so - and start moving toward correcting and/or limiting the damage that comes to the change connected to that decision.

Part of that may be apologizing to those that are being impacted due to that decision. Simply and honestly tell them that you blew it and that you are sorry and that if there was any way for you to go back and erase it all, you would.

Thing is, you can't. You can simply try to improve your current situation.

Can I also help you face some reality? It may be something that can be corrected fairly easily and quickly but prepare yourself for those situations that will NOT be corrected easily OR quickly. The main thing in a situation like that is to keep yourself focused on a SOLUTION and to NOT focus on the mistake and what happened in the past.

YES, pay attention to the mistake so that you can learn from it and not repeat it in the future but DO NOT LINGER ON IT!

I'd be happy to discuss this with your further if you'd like to contact me via the website and share with me your situation.

Remember this: WE ALL SCREW UP sooner or later. The key is what we do AFTER that realization.

Hopefully, as we mature and learn the changes in our life that are due to our own decisions will be more positive than negative and we'll learn to handle those that we can't control with a more positive attitude and mindset.

Until next time, be sure to ....

"Make it an AWESOME day! (Who else is going to do it for you?)"

Mike

The Path Taken Today

The Path Taken Today

The path taken today determines...

How would YOU complete that statement?

Would you, like many, end it by stating that the path taken today will determine your future?

If you were to state such, would you be talking about your "long-term" future or just your "immediate" future?

This is going to be short and to the point so stay focused and pay attention to what I'm actually saying here, o.k.?

I'll give a nod to the fact that the path taken today may determine your immediate future but there is no way in the world that I'd even give a hint of a nod to the idea that it determines your long-term future.

How discouraging and depressing it would be (and IS for many that fall into this "often promoted yet WRONG" thought process) to think that once you've made a mistake your future is doomed because of that mistake.

Should we be careful in our choices? Sure.

But, here's the deal according to the way I see it and according to the way I've been forced to live it at times... Your FUTURE is less determined by a path that you take than it is by how QUICKLY you are able to determine if you are on a WRONG path!

Think about that for a moment.

Simple analogy - if you take a wrong turn on a trip are you DESTINED to stay on that route and continue down a wrong direction? Uh, NO.

So, for one, you can turn around and correct this wrong decision by going back to where you made a wrong turn and correcting that mistake by then taking the RIGHT path. Right?

Here's another analogy that you may relate to... have you ever taken a wrong turn and had your GPS constantly remind you to turn around? But have you also had your GPS refigure directions based on the direction you are going (even if it IS wrong based on the original mapping) and allow you to get "back on the right path"? I have on several occasions.

So, secondly, once you realize you are on the wrong path you still have the ability to make a few adjustments and get back on track to reach your original destination even if it IS not the same path you meant or intended to take in the beginning. (By the way, this could also be called a "detour").

In closing, if you've made some wrong and even bad decisions or have gone down the wrong path then WAKE UP and do something about it. There is NO reason to keep heading down the wrong path ESPECIALLY once you realize you're going the wrong way.

THAT, my friends, would be idiotic.

Wouldn't it?

Stay on track, friend and, as you go along this journey always be sure to...

"Make it an AWESOME day! (Who else is going to do it for you?)"

Mike

The Power of Choice!

The Power of Choice!

Make no mistake about it - the power of CHOICE is a very POWERFUL thing we all possess!<>

Some treat this possession with great care while others use it lightly - not understanding (or, perhaps, not caring) the power of this possession.

This great possession - the power of CHOICE - will determine the direction of your day, week, month, year and life. Now, will anyone try to tell me that this is NOT a great and powerful possession?

You have it and I have it. We all have it. We all use it or abuse it.

What about you?

Now listen, in order for all of us to "get real" with this and in order for me not to come across as unrealistic I must say that there are times that we make wise choices and there are times that we make unwise choices.

Just because we may understand the POWER of choice does not mean we will always make the best choice. Aren't there times that you made an unwise choice but, at the time, you thought it was the RIGHT choice?

Those that abuse and fail to understand the power of this great possession are those that really don't put much - if any - thought and consideration into their choices. Many times they are perfectly happy to allow OTHERS to make their choices for them. This is a LAZY way to exist. I won't say it's a lazy way to "live" life because this is not living at all - it is existing.

So, where do you fit in?

Hopefully, even if you have been in the category of the "lazies" you have been working hard at transitioning to the category of one that truly understands the power of choice. But, again, please understand that this will not make you immune to bad choices.

What do YOU do when you discover that you have made a poor choice? Give up? Blame someone else? Sit down right where you are and throw a "pity party"? All of the above?

Here's the oddity about choices. Once made and acted upon, they cannot be changed. (Notice this - they can be made and changed BEFORE they are acted upon, but once they are acted upon, there is no changing them). HOWEVER...even once they have been acted upon and you realize it was a BAD choice, you CAN go back and decide to choose a different path.

That, in itself, is VERY POWERFUL!

Now, even though we can go back and decide to choose a different path doesn't mean that all of the impact of the bad choice will disappear. It won't!

But, here is a choice even about that: Even with the impact of a bad choice raining down on your head you have two choices - 1. Stay there and have your "pity party" while you suffer the negative consequences OR 2. Realizing that you are going to deal with the consequences regardless, you can retrace your steps and go back and make a decision that will take you down a better path even while the impact of your original bad choice still comes down all over and around you.

So....are you ready for this? Even though you make a BAD choice you still have a CHOICE as to whether or not you go back and CHOOSE to correct your original bad choice!

Wow!

Too many people think that once they have made a bad choice that they are STUCK!

WRONG!

Now, again, consequences may have to be paid for a very long time. For example, maybe you are one of the thousands of people that got into a loan situation for a house that, once those balloon payments rolled around, found out you couldn't afford that house after all and you ended up going through a foreclosure. "OH NO! MY LIFE IS RUINED!"

No, it's not.

Yes, there will be CONSEQUENCES to pay for a very long time - but your life is not over and it does not prevent you from learning from the experience and now making wiser choices.

I know that to be true because I went through it about 20 years ago. Never forget, "As long as there is breath there is hope!"

If you have not done so, go and listen to the podcasts for this week and tie all of this in together. Even if you don't like where you are right now -- it's not the end! You CAN make corrections and changes (which, in itself is a choice) to improve your situation.

I'd love to hear from you at anytime with your thoughts and your own experiences in this area. Just shoot me an e-mail at: mike@futureyouuniversity.com

Also, don't wait - it all begins TODAY!

And, as you go through your day with a positive mindset, don't forget to...

"Make it an AWESOME day! (Who else is going to do it for you?)"

Mike

FutureYouUniversity.com