Choose Wisely

"Make wise choices today!"

 

This was a daily encouragement that I would say as young men and women would pile out of the van or bus I was driving while working with a group of kids that were in foster care.

 

Did they always listen? Apparently not.

 

Have YOU always made wise choices. That one is easy - NO!

 

And, many times, we feel the sting and consequences of those poor choices. Some, obviously, are bigger than others but they ALL have consequences.

I've said it this way many times before: "What you do TODAY matters!"

My guess is that most - if not all - of us cried out, "I want to make my own decisions!" at some point in time while we were teens and living at home. A home, might I add, that we likely had nothing to do with providing, that likely included a place to sleep, shower, use the bathroom - INDOORS - and even had food to eat! Again, we likely had very little to do with any of that. Yet, we didn't want to abide by "their" rules...we wanted the freedom to make our own choices!

Sometimes it would be nice to not have to make so many choices again, wouldn't it? Sometimes we find that it would be quite nice to have someone else make the decisions for us. But, friend, it's just not that way anymore!

Some are still feeling the effects of poor choices and it continues on for years when it involves and includes children that, out of no fault of their own, become a part of those poor choices.

Let's get to the bottom line here: Although we cannot go back and undo those poor choices we CAN make better choices today that can do a couple of things -
     1. Better choices can bring about a process of healing that may be needed due to past poor choices.
     2. Better choices today can prevent us from making those same mistakes again!

Stop living in the past - that, alone, is a poor choice!

Live TODAY and make the best choices possible by putting thought - CLEAR thought - into the process. Yeah, you and I BOTH are capable of doing that, friend!

"As long as there is breath, there is hope!" -- I came up with that several years ago and it still applies today. TODAY you are alive and breathing. That means that TODAY you have the chance, the HOPE of making things better and making wiser choices!

So, get on with it. And, as you do so, be sure to...

"Make it an AWESOME day! (Who else is going to do it for you?)"

Mike

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CHANGES: I Screwed Up!

CHANGES: I SCREWED UP!!

Now, hopefully you're really familiar with F.Y.U (Future You University) but I hope you're not TOO familiar with I.S.U. (I Screwed Up!).

But, let's face it, since we are all human we ALL spend time trying to deal with the consequences that come when we screw up, right?

Before I get too far into the discussion for today, let's take a look at the four types of changes that we face in our lives:

TYPES OF CHANGES: (1)Those we voluntarily bring on ourselves... (2) those that we have no choice in but are not "against" us (change of seasons, life changes due to age, etc.)... (3)those that come at us DUE TO our actions and (4) those that come to us 100% involuntarily and at no fault of our own.

If you haven't gone back and read the articles on the first two (and/or listened to the podcasts that go with them) then you might want to do that first to catch up with the discussion so far.

So, for today, we are going to talk about the 3rd category listed above: Those changes that come our way due to our own actions. In other words, changes that come when we SCREW UP!

Here's the deal even with this: too many people still try to blame other people or other circumstances for their own screw ups and won't take the action necessary to accept the blame, do what can be done to correct the mess and then move on!

Does that describe you? (*OUCH!*)

Hey, let's face it...it's hard to ADMIT it when we suffer or those connected to us (spouse, children, friends, etc.) suffer due to our own screw ups! Seriously, who wants to admit to that?

But, it's necessary for us to wake up and realize that we have made a big mistake so that we can hopefully learn from it and avoid that same mistake in the future.

Have you noticed that those that fail to do this seem to keep making the same dumb mistakes over and over again?

Again, does that describe you?

If it does, DO soemthing about it and LEARN as you move forward.

Hey, let's face this fact too...sometimes we just make a wrong decision and we suffer CHANGES that aren't good for us or those that are around us. It's not necessarily a pattern in our lives but, nonetheless, it causes some problems, right?

Maybe you pulled your family up from where you lived and moved them across the country for a new job that you thought would be best for all of you and it turns out that it was, actually, a very poor decision.

This ties in closely with our last topic about those changes that come due to our voluntarily actions but, yet, it's a little different because, at times (unlike that last example) these changes come due to our stupidity.

A bit blunt, huh?

Sometimes an inablility to control our temper and/or our tongue results in changes due to that inability. Maybe you told your boss off and got fired. Now what?

Do that type of thing too many times and you will find it harder and harder to get hired by anyone!

I was talking to someone not too long ago that was complaining about their current situation so I asked them what their "ideal situation" would be. They described it to me and then said, "But I know that will never happen." When I asked them why they would say that here was their response: "Because of all of the stupid stuff that I keep on doing!"

Thing is, during the time period that I was having this discussion with this person they were still doing some of the same stupid stuff that was keeping them from their "ideal situation".

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

So, let's get on to thinking about some sort of solution to this mess. How does that sound?

FIRST, if you fit the type of scenario like the last guy I talked about then you MUST decide what is more important in your life....keeping on doing what you are doing and getting the same results OR starting to CHANGE your life so that you can IMPROVE your life. As you've heard many times before the very definition of insanity is to keep doing the same things over and over again and to expect different results.

Part of this solution is to begin to discipline yourself... your temper, your tongue, your attitude, etc. Only you can do it but this type of infomation and other positive information can help you in this endeavor.

SECONDLY, if you are suffering through change due to a misinformed decision then, most importanlty, admit that mistake - no matter how hard it is to do so - and start moving toward correcting and/or limiting the damage that comes to the change connected to that decision.

Part of that may be apologizing to those that are being impacted due to that decision. Simply and honestly tell them that you blew it and that you are sorry and that if there was any way for you to go back and erase it all, you would.

Thing is, you can't. You can simply try to improve your current situation.

Can I also help you face some reality? It may be something that can be corrected fairly easily and quickly but prepare yourself for those situations that will NOT be corrected easily OR quickly. The main thing in a situation like that is to keep yourself focused on a SOLUTION and to NOT focus on the mistake and what happened in the past.

YES, pay attention to the mistake so that you can learn from it and not repeat it in the future but DO NOT LINGER ON IT!

I'd be happy to discuss this with your further if you'd like to contact me via the website and share with me your situation.

Remember this: WE ALL SCREW UP sooner or later. The key is what we do AFTER that realization.

Hopefully, as we mature and learn the changes in our life that are due to our own decisions will be more positive than negative and we'll learn to handle those that we can't control with a more positive attitude and mindset.

Until next time, be sure to ....

"Make it an AWESOME day! (Who else is going to do it for you?)"

Mike

Choose Responsibly, ACT Responsibly!

Would THIS Help?

Wouldn't it be wonderful if it really WAS as easy as seeing a sign like the one above?

Now, let me ask you another question...do you think you'd STILL choose the "RIGHT DECISION" 100% of the time even if there WERE such a sign right in front of you?

Let me answer that for you...NO, you wouldn't!

Why? Because that's just the way we are. We are basically selfish people and we tend to do what WE want as opposed to what may be the "right" or "best" thing to do.

Follow me on this example and be honest with yourself. How many times during the course of your life have you KNOWN what was the right vs. wrong thing to do and you chose the WRONG thing anyway? You may have even known that you might get punished and/or grounded when (not if!) your parents found out about it but, your SELFISH desire to do what YOU wanted overcame that fear of punishment and, you did what YOU wanted to do anyway!

Not very responsible, is it?

Now, sure, we can excuse things like that to our being young and foolish but - ARE YOU READY TO GET HONEST NOW? - how many of us STILL act in such a way from time to time?

You see, it's not enough to just CHOOSE responsibly but it's also important to put that CHOICE into ACTION! And, yes, it's possible to choose and not act....remember, you HAVE done such a thing even in your own life.

If you're still having a hard time thinking that you HAVE done such a thing let me ask you still ANOTHER question. Has anyone - EVER - in your whole life ever said something like the following to you....."But I thought you said you were going to ____________ (fill in the blank)!" ?

That's right. You may have even "announced" what your choice was and STILL decided to do something different. You decided NOT to act upon that choice. It may be something as simple as, "I thought you said you were going to wash the car today!" to something much more serious such as, "I thought you said you were going to stop drinking!".

So, to sum this all up, let's look at what we've discussed:

1. It's important to CHOOSE RESPONSIBLY what we allow into our minds. What we allow into our minds/mindset (positive or negative) WILL have a DIRECT impact upon our lives and the lives of each and every person that we come into contact with each and every day.

2. Understand the responsibility that you have to others besides yourself. It's not all about you! But, at the same time, the better you become the better you become for those around you!

3. Don't make choices or decisions "in the heat of the moment". They will most likely be the WRONG decisions.

4. Do the research needed to make a responsible decision. Pray about it. Think about it. Sleep on it. Then, and only then, should you really try to make such a decision.

5. Even after all of what you did in #4 DO NOT be tempted to still act upon your selfish impulses. It's not enough to just CHOOSE responsibly, you must also ACT upon that responsible choice!

Hey listen, we are all human and we will STILL make irresponsible and/or unwise decisions. However, we CAN equip ourselves in such a way that we make fewer and fewer of these types of decisions in our lives.

I'd love to hear any feedback you have on these thoughts and your experiences in this area.

Thanks for your time today and be sure to check out the audio podcasts on these topics at http://www.michaelspillman.com/

Until next time...

"Be sure to make it an AWESOME day! (Who else is going to do it for you?)"

Mike

How To Choose Responsibly

"HOW TO CHOOSE RESPONSIBLY"

Good ol' Monty Hall and "Let's Make a Deal". I talked about this program in yesterday's entry so, if you missed it, go back and check it out.

One of the things I mentioned was the tendency of ALL of us to say AFTER all has been revealed, "Oh, I KNEW I should have picked that other choice!"

20/20 hindsight, remember?

I'm sure you would agree that this is EASY to apply to our lives. I'm sure ALL of us can look back on both good and bad decisions we have made and see rather EASILY what we either should have done or breathe a sigh of relief because of what we DID choose.

So, how CAN we choose responsibly?

The main part of the answer is found in one word in the question - "responsibly".

Decisions that are made without much thought are usually irresponsible decisions. They may be made in the heat of passion or anger or just an overdrive dose of excitement. (By the way, this is why so many sales pitches try to get you to "BUY NOW" or tell you that the offer is good "for today only"! When this is the case you might want to really consider staying away at LEAST until you have had a chance to step away and think about it AWAY from the hype.)

So, first and foremost, in order to make a RESPONSIBLE decision about ANYTHING, make sure you are not being swayed by emotion of any kind.

You should also avoid any choice that is being swayed by DESPERATION! This is another type of emotion that bring people to making rash and irresponsible decisions. Again - PAY ATTENTION TO THIS PATTERN - there are many "sales people" that are actually looking for people to "prey on" that are DESPERATE. Again, take the time to step away from the situation and give yourself a chance to think clearly.

Think about it this way - many times when someone is struggling to keep from drowning they will take their rescuer down with them and drown them as well. Why? PANIC! DESPERATION! Life guards are taught to be aware of this upon their approach so that they do not become a second victim of the situation. Most people, when they have a chance to think of it when they are NOT desperate, know that they should try to remain calm and listen to the rescuer and do as they say. But, in the heat of the moment it's often a different story!

And, finally (at least for this article) you must consider your RESPONSIBILITY toward others if you wish to choose responsibly. This is the part that I said was found in one of the words to the main question. All of the things that I have mentioned so far in this article can fall into this category. Consider your responsibility to others BEFORE making a choice. This may be your spouse, your kids, other family members, your boss and/or coworkers, etc.

You may - in the heat of the moment (remember, this is the time to STEP AWAY!) decide that you want to take a job on the opposite coast without even thinking about the repercussions on your family. Oops!

Sure, it's "your life" but you have also made some choices earlier in your life - if you have a family - that has brought others into the equation that MAKES UP "your life" and they MUST be considered in your decisions. Like it or not - that's just the way it is, friend.

UNLESS you choose to act irresponsibly!

And, if you are NOT married and you plan to do so one day then, please understand, it is IMPERATIVE that you spend time talking about all kinds of things with your potential partner so that you can BOTH see if you are on "the same page" on important things.

Well, that's enough for today.

How do you choose responsibly? DO NOT MAKE DECISIONS IN THE "HEAT OF THE MOMENT". That's it in a nutshell.

HOMEWORK: (What? What do you mean "homework"?) Take a moment and look back over decisions that you would now label as "poor" and see if you can find some "heat of the moment" factor that was connected to that decision. I'd love to hear what you find.

Until next time...

"Make it an AWESOME day! (Who else is going to do it for you?)"

Mike

http://www.michaelspillman.com/

The Power of Choice!

The Power of Choice!

Make no mistake about it - the power of CHOICE is a very POWERFUL thing we all possess!<>

Some treat this possession with great care while others use it lightly - not understanding (or, perhaps, not caring) the power of this possession.

This great possession - the power of CHOICE - will determine the direction of your day, week, month, year and life. Now, will anyone try to tell me that this is NOT a great and powerful possession?

You have it and I have it. We all have it. We all use it or abuse it.

What about you?

Now listen, in order for all of us to "get real" with this and in order for me not to come across as unrealistic I must say that there are times that we make wise choices and there are times that we make unwise choices.

Just because we may understand the POWER of choice does not mean we will always make the best choice. Aren't there times that you made an unwise choice but, at the time, you thought it was the RIGHT choice?

Those that abuse and fail to understand the power of this great possession are those that really don't put much - if any - thought and consideration into their choices. Many times they are perfectly happy to allow OTHERS to make their choices for them. This is a LAZY way to exist. I won't say it's a lazy way to "live" life because this is not living at all - it is existing.

So, where do you fit in?

Hopefully, even if you have been in the category of the "lazies" you have been working hard at transitioning to the category of one that truly understands the power of choice. But, again, please understand that this will not make you immune to bad choices.

What do YOU do when you discover that you have made a poor choice? Give up? Blame someone else? Sit down right where you are and throw a "pity party"? All of the above?

Here's the oddity about choices. Once made and acted upon, they cannot be changed. (Notice this - they can be made and changed BEFORE they are acted upon, but once they are acted upon, there is no changing them). HOWEVER...even once they have been acted upon and you realize it was a BAD choice, you CAN go back and decide to choose a different path.

That, in itself, is VERY POWERFUL!

Now, even though we can go back and decide to choose a different path doesn't mean that all of the impact of the bad choice will disappear. It won't!

But, here is a choice even about that: Even with the impact of a bad choice raining down on your head you have two choices - 1. Stay there and have your "pity party" while you suffer the negative consequences OR 2. Realizing that you are going to deal with the consequences regardless, you can retrace your steps and go back and make a decision that will take you down a better path even while the impact of your original bad choice still comes down all over and around you.

So....are you ready for this? Even though you make a BAD choice you still have a CHOICE as to whether or not you go back and CHOOSE to correct your original bad choice!

Wow!

Too many people think that once they have made a bad choice that they are STUCK!

WRONG!

Now, again, consequences may have to be paid for a very long time. For example, maybe you are one of the thousands of people that got into a loan situation for a house that, once those balloon payments rolled around, found out you couldn't afford that house after all and you ended up going through a foreclosure. "OH NO! MY LIFE IS RUINED!"

No, it's not.

Yes, there will be CONSEQUENCES to pay for a very long time - but your life is not over and it does not prevent you from learning from the experience and now making wiser choices.

I know that to be true because I went through it about 20 years ago. Never forget, "As long as there is breath there is hope!"

If you have not done so, go and listen to the podcasts for this week and tie all of this in together. Even if you don't like where you are right now -- it's not the end! You CAN make corrections and changes (which, in itself is a choice) to improve your situation.

I'd love to hear from you at anytime with your thoughts and your own experiences in this area. Just shoot me an e-mail at: mike@futureyouuniversity.com

Also, don't wait - it all begins TODAY!

And, as you go through your day with a positive mindset, don't forget to...

"Make it an AWESOME day! (Who else is going to do it for you?)"

Mike

FutureYouUniversity.com

TODAY Matters 4 Youth!

TODAY Matters 4 Youth!

How old is old? That's a question with an answer that is dependent upon who it is you are asking! I'm 50 years old right now, so to me, 70 would be considered old and yet, someone that is 70 would suggest to you that anyone OLDER than them is old!

When I was a teenager, I couldn't imagine someone being 25 years old - THAT WAS OLD!

So it is when I say that today's message is for "young people" or "youth" -- what does that mean and who does that include?

I'll try to clarify it in the following way: Anyone that has the ability to understand what I'm saying (we're talking "little one's" now!) up through those that have completed college and are in the 20's...that's who I'm talking to today.

How's that?

What do I feel that this message is so important for you? Because so many people in the world will tell you that what you do right now in your life doesn't really matter! And, from what I've seen, the younger you are the more likely it is that you will hear this said.

Bottom line: THAT JUST ISN'T TRUE! It's a LIE!

Regardless of your age - no matter how young you may be - what you do TODAY MATTERS!

Now, let me clarify something else again - I'm not trying to get you to "grow up" too fast and skip your childhood or the life of a teen. Enjoy every bit of it WHILE YOU CAN!

But what I AM saying is this: no matter how young you are you can make "life-impacting" decisions TODAY!

Since I usually direct my thoughts toward adults, let mention a couple of things to you first: 1.) I am not going to "talk down" to you - regardless of your age. You need to hear this "straight"and "to the point" and that's what I am going to do. It's what I always try to do regardless of the age of my audience. 2.) Although I emphasize the fact that TODAY is all we have and that, in reality there is no such thing as tomorrow (what do you call that 24 hour period that we refer to as "tomorrow" once it arrives? "TODAY"!) we still MUST be planning for the future. Our future is NOW. I wanted to get that out there before I continue on with this discussion. There now, let's move on!

What you do today matters because you are laying the FOUNDATION - the BUILDING BLOCKS - for your future TODAY! And, just like with any building of any size, if you have a shoddy or weak foundation, that building will not be stable and it WILL come crashing down!

Here's my main point: I encourage you - I CHALLENGE YOU - to make a decision NOW - TODAY - to live a life of character!

What do I mean? I challenge you to STEP UP and ABOVE those around you and choose to live a life of honesty and honor which, in turn, is living a life of character.

Hey, don't laugh this off - what you do TODAY matters and what you do TODAY becomes a habit for your life! Really think about that!

Don't laugh it off when I challenge you to NOT CHEAT on any tests or assignments. The sad thing is that this has become so common place that many young people would look at me like I'm crazy for saying that. Really? This is what I mean by you stepping UP and ABOVE the rest!

It's not "just" about not cheating on tests or assignments, it's about living a life of TRUTH! Dedicate yourself to a life of TRUTH and you WILL "rise above the rest"! That's a promise and guarantee!

Why is this so? Because so many of your peers WON'T and DON'T live a life of truth! And you're decision to do so will set you apart and lay a solid foundation for a powerful and positive future.

Living a life of character means that, because you life a life of TRUTH, when you speak people believe you. Think about how important that really is.

If your habit has been to lie about big things or small, how do you get anyone to believe you when you really ARE telling them the truth?

Understand this: some people may appear to be "making it" in the word by living a life of dishonesty and lies - you can see it around you each and every day - but that is a facade, a "false appearance" and you need to dedicate yourself to NOT be lured away by false appearances.

People that live this kind of life will encourage you to take the path of least resistance! Instead of dedicating and disciplining yourself to WORK at an honest job, they will try to lure you away with the "false appearance" of money and wealth.

I know that the lure is strong for some of you. But I want to CHALLENGE you to STAND UP and STAND ABOVE the rest! You CAN do it if you set your mind to it and I will do all I can to encourage you along the way.

And, you know what? There are many more people just like me out there that are waiting and willing to HELP YOU ACHIEVE this life of character!

The habits that you form TODAY will shape all of your "tomorrows". Regardless of your age!

THIS CHOICE IS NOT EASY and the life that comes from choosing to live a life of character is not always easy either!

One last thought - You may think that those that live a life based on dishonesty and lies have a lot of things that you desire such as popularity, friends, money and lots of "stuff". But I encourage you to look again and look very closely.

Those that live this kind of life really have NO true friends. Those people that you see following them and surrounding them will stab them in the back (both figuratively and literally) at their first opportunity. Those that live this kind of life can never really be at peace for they are always "watching their back" due to what I just said about those that surround them. When that "stuff" is gone - so are the so-called "friends".

Choose a life of character - regardless of your age. You attract those that are like you! Usually this is worded that you become like those you hang around and this is true. However, I want to turn it around and use it to show the power that YOU have in and with your life!

When you choose to live a life of character you will attract others that are drawn to this type of life and decision.

When can you begin this process? When you can you take the first step of this journey?

TODAY! Right now.

And, YES, YOU CAN! Never doubt that.

Contact me at any time via the information that you can find on my website (http://www.FutureYouUniversity.com) - I'd love to hear from you.

And, as you go through each day always remember to...

"Make it an AWESOME day! (Who else is going to do it for you?)"

Mike

Decisions - Part 5: "Yeah, Adults, Too!"

"Yeah, Adults, Too!"

Hopefully, as adults, we are wiser than when we were younger! I'm not sure who wrote the song but I know I've heard it sung by Rod Stewart with the words, "I wish that I knew what I know now, when I was younger!" Nice thought, right?

But, the fact is - it doesn't work that way....it works just the opposite. We know more now than we did earlier but the key question is this: Has it made a difference in our ability to make wise choices?

For some, yes and for others, apparently not!

Now, again, let me clarify something - even the "smartest" and "most prepared" people in the world still sometimes make wrong choices. As adults, we are not immune to such things.

But, we should be able to LIMIT these poor choices a lot better than we did before simply because of our experiences in living life.

Stupid decisions come in all forms, don't they? They don't always have to be centered around marital infidelity as was mentioned in the last example given in our first episode in this series. Don't you know - hopefully - that the pro golfer who's career is basically ruined for the moment and who's family life is apparently is in shambles really regrets his unwise choices?

The reason I say, "hopefully" is that - and we've all seen this from time to time - sometimes people still refuse to admit that they made a mistake! People with this mindset are doomed to repeat stupid mistakes over and over again.

Be sure to come back tomorrow as we talk about the one "key principle" that must be followed in order for us to recover and still be productive following these HUGE mistakes.

Now then, if we, as adults, SHOULD make better decisions now, due to our experiences, WHY DON'T WE?

I know that some people may think that I "over-generalize" on some of this and, if I do, it is not intentional. I know that not ALL young people are alike or act the same. There are MANY young people that DO think things through ahead of time and that DO consider the consequences and make wise choices.

However, for the most part - in general - young people DON'T think about consequences OR, if they do, they think that they will be the exception. Why? Some of it is simply the bravado of youth and some of it is the basic feeling of invincibility that young people feel. I remember not even thinking about the possibility that I could be killed or terribly injured OR kill or injure someone else when I drove WAY beyond my experience level. In other words, I drove like an idiot!

Some of this is what we LOVE about youth - RISK TAKING!

However, all of us - young or old - must remember that, "With every night comes a morning after!".

As we get older and take on more responsibility (family, for example) we tend to "tone down" some of these youthful exuberance and think a little more about consequences. Yes, I know sometimes this leads to us being SO CAREFUL that we fail to live life, but that is another topic for another time.

Our experience can also be our downfall at times. Let me explain what I mean.

As adults, sometimes we begin to feel wise beyond our years (kind of like me driving when I was a teenager!). As adults, we feel that, through observation and experience we have it all figured out and, due to that experience - and so called "wisdom" - we can avoid the possible consequences. We've figured it all out! It won't happen to us!

Wow, sounds a whole like how young people think, if you ask me! The difference is this - when you are young, you THINK you know, but you don't due to your inexperience that comes from being young! However, as an adult, you SHOULD know and you SHOULD know better! But, for whatever reason, when temptation comes our way - in WHATEVER form - we convince ourselves that we are invincible - not due to our youth, but due to our self-perceived "wisdom".

To me, this is much sadder than seeing a young person (teen or young adult) make some of these mistakes. Why? Because as a teen or young adult, it's part of the process and HOPEFULLY you wise up before you make the HUGE blunders!

But, for an adult - YOU SHOULD KNOW BETTER! You've seen countless lives ruined by making the same STUPID decisions...."but it won't happen to me!"

This applies to our relationships with our spouses and families but it also applies to ANY unwise choice that we are considering. Perhaps it has something to do with your work in some way that you have decided to cheat the company or take some sort of shortcut to bring you some financial reward.

THINK! THINK! THINK!

Remember the first basic principle that we talked about early on? First and foremost we must consider what we want our life to look like! Where do we want to go with our lives and what will that look like?

ADULT, WAKE UP! Regardless of your age, this is a process that we must STILL continue! We must STILL ask ourselves - especially when considering something that is unwise - what do want our life to look like on the other side of this? IF I choose to go through this, what might happen?

Instead of thinking, "It won't happen to me!" why not think, "What if I DO get caught and/or what if this backfires - what will happen then?"

I have talked with many an adult that felt absolutely foolish after having these unwise decisions backfire on them. And, yes, many times these are the words that come out of their mouths: "I can't believe I did that! What was I thinking? I just didn't think it would go this far and I just didn't think it would turn out this way."

But, guess what? It did. It does. YOU ARE NOT IMMUNE!

Honestly ask yourself this question....if you KNEW that after following through with this "thing" (whatever it is) that you know deep down is not wise, you would loose everything that you have - your family (ALL of your family), your job, your house and your dignity - would you still go through with it?

No, don't say, "But it won't!" - ask yourself what if you DO! No doubts - 100% sure that you will end up on the other side with nothing....would you still go through with it?

Here's the scary thought...many adults get up in the bravado of "experience" (as opposed to the bravado of youth) and still try to say that they WILL go through with it because they know nothing bad will happen. It won't happen to them.

Sad.

But it doesn't have to be IF we wake up and THINK long before we get to that situation -- this, again, is the FOUNDATIONAL principle we talked about first and foremost. It also goes along with what we discussed about making your decision EARLY instead of waiting until you are in the "heat of battle" or in the clutches of the temptation - whether sex, prestige, power or all three.

We, as adults, must also consider the point of, "Who are you listening to?". Seriously, pay close attention to this one as well!

I have been saying all along that everything that we have talked about in this series applied to adults just as much as it did to teens or young adults.

However, I felt the need to address this specifically BECAUSE ADULTS SOMETIMES FEEL THAT THEY ARE IMMUNE to the mistakes that they would make earlier on in their lives.

That, in itself, shows poor judgment, wouldn't you agree?

Again, be sure to join me tomorrow as I bring this discussion to a conclusion and talk about how ANYONE can recover from even the worst of decisions and live a productive life IF they follow this one key principle.

Until then...

"Make it an AWESOME day! (Who else is going to do it for you?)"

Mike

Decisions: "What If?"

Part 4: "Decisions: What If?"

I hope that this series has been beneficial for you - I know it is always helpful for me to revisit these thoughts and ideas for my own life. Why? Because we ALL - including myself - are susceptible to making unwise choices!

Each of us has the tendency to "get off course" from time to time and not follow the map we have plotted out for where we want to go.

Getting off course does not mean that we must give up!

Think about that and use the "travel and map" scenario that I have been using during this discussion. If you discover that you have taken a wrong turn on your journey (hey, men NEVER get lost - we just get temporarily turned around from time to time!) what do you do?

Imagine someone in that situation saying to his wife, "Well, we took a wrong turn and there's nothing we can do about it. We're stuck here and there's nothing we can do about it. So, wherever it is that we are right now - this is our new home whether we like it or not!"

The response: "ARE YOU CRAZY?"

Question: if you wouldn't do that in the scenario described then why would you do that with your life - something far more important than a trip in an automobile?

No, we would not do what is described above, would we? We would simply look at the map, try to figure out where we took the wrong turn (a very important step, especially for our lives) and then figure out how to get back ON the right course. Then, we follow our new plan to get back on course with our original plan.

It's really pretty simple to see when you look at it that way, isn't it?

Yet, it's not so easy in real life, is it?

It's NOT easy but, also remember - it's NOT impossible to recover from making STUPID decisions! It's hard to do and a lot of people will do all they can to convince you to give up (the negative forces will be working overtime on you!), but you CAN do it if you are determined to do so.

But, WHAT IF?

Let's stick to the same scenario that I've been using so far....WHAT IF you had never taken that wrong turn? Would there be a need to try to figure out what went wrong? Would you be stuck on the side of the road somewhere that you had not planned to be? Would you have to re-figure a way to get back on track? NO!

So it is with making poor choices and decisions. Each of us can go back - if we really want to figure this out - and find a point that can cause us to ask ourselves, "WHAT IF?".

Here's an excellent example about the first situation I discussed on Monday's podcast and on Monday's blog about the college football player seemed to make one bad decision after another. It's about the "what if" factor in his life. If you would, finish reading this blog and then click the link and go to the story - but here it is:

http://www.thefootballexpert.com/mauriceclarettwhatif080001.html

Here's the thing - we ALL make mistakes and will continue to make them as long as we live. HOWEVER, we CAN limit the situations that cause us to ask, "WHAT IF?".

Living a life full of "what ifs" is no way to live and it is no way to progress toward your goals and dreams.

----- We are coming closer to the conclusion of this discussion so be sure to join me back here for the next installment. Thank you for listening and/or reading and I'd appreciate any feedback that you may have. You can either comment directly on this blog OR send me an e-mail at: mike@futureyouuniversity.com

Thanks again and, always remember...

"Make it an AWESOME day! (Who else is going to do it for you?)"

Mike

Decisions - Part 2: Who Are YOU Listening To?

PART 2: "Who Are YOU Listening To?"

In today's podcast and blog entry I want to begin to discuss ways that ALL of us - regardless of age - can do to do better in making WISE choices and decisions. Adults are not immune to making HUGE mistakes!

Let's use this example to get started today...

You are traveling in your car and you come to a section of highway that splits off so that you have a choice of going one of two ways. What do you do? Which way do you go?

It depends on where you want to go, doesn't it? If you KNOW where it is you want to go you will KNOW which way to go!

In the same way, if you really don't care where you end up, one road is as good as the other - it really doesn't matter.

So, really, the beginning point in making the right choices is simply this:

WHERE DO YOU WANT TO GO?

What do you want to achieve in your life? What are your plans, hopes, dreams? Where do you want to be five years from now? You've heard all of that before, but perhaps now is the first time you've really seen the importance of thoughts like this.

You see, if it really doesn't matter to you where you end up, then ANY choice - wise or unwise - is as good as the other. However, if you KNOW where you want to go with your future then you will do better at making the RIGHT decisions that will help you get where you want to go and you will also do better at AVOIDING the WRONG decisions - or poor choices - that might take you off of your desired path.

So, what do you want for your life? You may not know EXACTLY what it is you want to accomplish in your future, but you should have some idea of what you want your future you look like. USE THIS AS YOUR MAP AND GUIDE as you travel this journey of life with it's twists and turns.

Now then, once you have taken a good look at this first, general principle that is necessary for ALL of us, then everything else you do should be an extension of it, right?

Where you want to go will also help you decide who it is that you listen to - whose voice you will hear. So, let's list it as the #1 deciding factor in making wise choices (again, the first part of this is the main foundation - it is THE starting point of all areas of your life!)...

Who Are YOU Listening To?

There are a lot of "voices" out there. There are a lot of people that are more than willing to give you "advice" on what to do with your future and, again, this for anyone at ANY age!

As you go back and look at the listing of people who made some TERRIBLE decisions from yesterday's podcast and blog you can KNOW that, with each of these situations there were those that were willingly giving "advice" or telling those involved "what to do".

Would you agree that, in those situations, those involved should NOT have listened to those voices?

Here's the deal - the best way to NOT hear those voices is to separate yourself FROM those voices!

It's just a fact of life - you will become like those that you surround yourself with. It's true! Regardless of how strong you think you are or what you think your ability is to "stand above" the crowd, you will become like those your surround yourself with.

So, if you hang around a bunch of losers, guess what? YOU WILL BECOME A LOSER!

"Oh no, not me!" Those words have been spoken by many a person headed for failure.

If you hang around people that make poor decisions - STUPID decisions - what do you think you will do?

You see, if you KNOW where you want to go with your life then you will also choose carefully those that you "travel" with along the way! Think about that!

Those that have NO DIRECTION in their life will try to persuade you to do the same and be the same. They DO NOT LIKE for anyone to have that kind of focus in their lives and they will do all they can to bring you down to their level - THIS IS A FACT!

Remember, "Life is a CHOICE - CHOOSE WISELY!"

Our friends are some of the biggest influences in our lives - think long and hard about that and consider the friends that you spend time with on a daily basis. Now then, regardless of where you THINK you are headed - based on these friends, where ARE you headed?

This is not always an easy task. Please know that from the beginning. Making necessary breaks is a very difficult thing to do and those "friends" will not allow that to happen without a fight.

But remember: this is YOUR life and YOUR future. That being so, it is up to YOU to make wise decisions beginning with those that surround you and have influence on you.

Too, take into consideration your ability to surround yourself with positive information through blogs and podcasts like this. Consider the fact that you can associate with many great and influential people without ever actually meeting them! I never got to shake Jim Rohn's hand although I did have the opportunity to hear him speak on a few occasions. HOWEVER, I can still be influenced by his words even though he passed away this past December.

Finally, remember this. Although we are talking about your future and the importance of you making plans for your future, remember that you make progress on that journey ONE DAY AT A TIME.

Just today. That's it. YES, know where you want to go! YES, make those plans. But understand these two things:

1. What you do TODAY affects all of your tomorrows!

2. TODAY is all you have. Make wise decisions TODAY - one day at a time!

And, please know this - I am here to help you in any way that I can and so are many others. Do not hesitate to contact me at any time by sending me an e-mail at: mike@futureyouuniversity.com

And as you travel along this journey, never forget to...

"Make it an AWESOME day! (Who else is going to do it for you?)"

Mike