Tuesday, November 18, 2014

7th of 8 Things to Give Up

Whether you realize it or not, the FEAR OF SUCCESS is very closely related to the FEAR OF FAILURE. That seems to be a bit strange, doesn't it?
How can these two ends of the spectrum - fear and success - be closely related or connected?

The truth is, ALL of the things we have discussed thus far in this series is connected to FEAR.
Too many of us feel that we just don't "deserve" success in ANY area of our lives (doubting yourself, negative self-talk). Whether it be relationships, advancement at the workplace or financial success, too many feel that they just don't have "what it takes" or that they just can't "make it happen" (criticising yourself). Yet, at the same time, we are fearful of others getting ahead of us, so we may even criticize them as a way to "point out" their flaws.  And, yes, this fear can cause us to continue to postpone (procrastinate) needed actions that might bring success.
What if I do succeed? What if I mess things up and I end up failing anyway? What if I let others down in the process? What if my life changes and I lose some of my old friends?  And, this can even lead to the following thought: "The best way to avoid all of that is to just stay with my present situation and not change anything."

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On the podcast I talk about a "self-preservation" characteristic that many young people have that are in the foster care system. When you understand that most of the adults in their life have disappointed them and let them down, it begins to make sense. If they begin to feel that they are getting too close to you or that they are beginning to trust you, they will do what they can to sabotage the relationship. They will "act out" in a way that they think will cause you to not care about them any longer. This is the "fear of a successful relationship" based on the "fear of past failure" in relationships.
As silly as it sounds, many people do the same thing in all areas of potential success in their lives. Think about it, procrastination can be a form of sabotage.
Just as has been true with all of the things we have examined so far, so it is with this: The best way to FACE and DEFEAT FEAR (any fear) is to TAKE ACTION in the face of fear!
Are you on the verge of success?
Yeah, do THAT.
And, until next time, always be sure to...
"Make it an AWESOME day! (Who else is going to do it for you?)"

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