E + R = O
Event + Response = Outcome
The "formula" or "equation" that you find listed above, comes from Jack Canfield and the meaning for each of the letters of the formula are listed below the equation.
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What you'll find here is the basic idea behind Mr. Canfield's formula...and it's TRUE. Follow through and you'll soon understand that, indeed (although not always easy), it IS the truth.
1. EVENT - You and I cannot control the event - ANY event - that comes our way. The event is simply, "what happens" throughout the course of the day. An event may be good or it may even be considered bad. The event is what it is. I know that wording it this way may be a bit confusing, so I'll try to clarify this a little bit.
We ALL encounter "events" in our lives and, in each and every day. We cannot "change" or "direct" an event...we experience the event. An event may be something as simple as experiencing a good meal as part of your day or having a nice conversation with a co-worker or friend. It could also be something less enjoyable like having a flat tire on your way into the office or even getting involved in a minor "fender-bender". And, yes, there are "bigger" events that come our way that have a bit more impact (either positive or negative) on our lives. It could be a great new job or promotion while, on the other hand, it may be the loss of a job due to a layoff or even getting fired. It could be the birth of a new child or the death of a spouse or other family member.
2. RESPONSE - If you take a closer look at the image above, you will see that I have written the words, "The one I control!", underneath the equation. You see, as I have already said, an event is an event and we cannot influence that event one way or the other. HOWEVER, it is our RESPONSE to that event that will determine the outcome that follows that event.
Hey, listen, I understand that this part of the formula takes quite a bit of discipline at times. It's not always easy to RESPOND in a positive way to a negative event. Please don't misunderstand, I'm not saying that we should smile and say, "No worries", when a tragedy comes our way. Not at all.
But, your response to that tragedy, for example, will determine the ultimate outcome from that tragic event. For example, you may experience the death of a loved one...maybe even your spouse or a child. I've not experienced either but I have worked closely with those that have experienced both and I can't even imagine how difficult that must be. You can either allow devastation and depression to overtake you to the point that you become of no use to anyone - including yourself. If you have children, for example, they need you to help them through the tragedy as well but, if your RESPONSE takes you away from the life that must continue, then the outcome will not be very positive.
Yet, as difficult as it may be, you may determine that you must keep on living and, as part of that task, you must continue to be a parent to your children and help them deal with the same tragedy with which you must deal. You may determine to be appreciative for the time that you had with your spouse and, as painful as it may be, you find a way to smile when those memories come across your mind. This is your chosen RESPONSE.
We CHOOSE our response. You may have heard others say, or you may have even said, "They make me so mad!" or "They ruined my day!". Neither of those statements are true. You made a choice and, in those examples, you CHOSE to allow that person to determine your outcome.
I've seen examples where a person allowed others to "impact" his response to the point that this person became miserable at the workplace.
Originally, he was happy to be there and enjoyed his work. However, over time, he allowed the negativity that you find at most work environments to affect his response in a negative way. He began to "give in" to the negative thoughts and, as a result, his RESPONSE was to be negative. He began to gripe and complain and, eventually, lost his job due to his negative attitude.
I was that person.
3. OUTCOME - In one of my recent blog articles entitled, "Don't Quit & No Excuses!" , I make the statement that, more often than not, when someone quits something (or gets fired, for example) they will pretty much ALWAYS make excuses as to why that happened. They will make an EXCUSE as to why they experienced the OUTCOME that they did. Yet, the truth is, they received the OUTCOME that they did due to their RESPONSE to the events that they encountered on a daily basis.
In the example above, I had allowed myself to be influenced by the negativity around me. I MADE A CHOICE about my response to the negativity (the events) around me. And, it cost me in a lot of ways.
This was quite a few years before I really began to concentrate on turning things around concerning my mindset and the direction of my life. But, it did stick with me and I did not like how I had changed during my time at that job. Even then, I knew I had failed by allowing others to have the impact on me instead of me using my influence on them. Thankfully, I later began to make better decisions / responses based on what I was putting into "the library of my mind".
How do you feel about the outcomes that you are experiencing in your life? Are you satisfied with them? Some people are satisfied with SOME of the outcomes, but most people feel that they would prefer better outcomes more often.
Jim Rohn put it this way (and I paraphrase): "If you don't like where you are or what you are doing - MOVE! MAKE A CHANGE! You are not a tree...YOU have the ability to MOVE!"
It takes discipline and discipline requires patience and determination. How bad do YOU want better outcomes in and for your life?
Here's the final thought on this: Consider the fact that you read this article as one of the EVENTS for your day. Now then, what's your RESPONSE? Will you just read it and walk away or will you allow it to sink in and and influence you in a positive way to become more disciplined with your responses to the events that come your way?
As always, the choice is yours. So, what will YOU do?
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And, until next time, whatever you do, be sure to...