Kelly Clarkson currently has a song out that has the following line in it, "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger". We've all heard that saying before, right? And, by the way, I DO love that song! It's kind of hard to sit still when she kicks that chorus in!
I do understand the idea behind that saying but I'm not sure it's 100% accurate. If you are in a car accident and are paralyzed from the neck down are you STRONGER than before? No. However, you may become stronger mentally and attitudinally. But, that may not always be the case either. I'm sure you can add your own examples along that same thought line.
Yet, at the core of that saying lies this truth that I've been sharing for the past three years: "AS LONG AS THERE IS BREATH, THERE IS HOPE!"
Don't ever forget that and, along with yesterday's introductory article, "When Bad Things Happen" we need to remember that we have some choices. The first of these that I'll be addressing today is, "LET IT DEFINE YOU".
Who are you? Why are you "who" you are? What has made you who you are? Yes, I understand that all of our experiences have been a part of making us "who" we are but, again, don't miss this point - YOUR PAST DOES NOT DETERMINE YOUR FUTURE!
Currently, my wife and I are working with kids in foster care and there are some horrible and heart-wrenching stories behind the lives of some of these young people. However, it is so important for me to emphasize to them that their past DOES NOT determine their future! The mistakes of those that were supposed to love and care for them DOES NOT determine a continued future of hurt and distrust! Their own mistakes - OUR OWN MISTAKES - does NOT determine the same for their (our) future!
Too many people give up thinking that there is NOTHING that they can do to change this direction of their life and, my friend, there is NOTHING further from the TRUTH!
I talk on the podcast (iTunes - http://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/mike-spillmans-future-you/id423660739 and the RSS feed - http://mikespillman.hipcast.com/rss/futureyouuniversity.xml ) about those that are dealing with or have dealt with tragic loss in their lives. I can't even imagine what it would be like to lose a child or to lose my wife. I came close to losing my wife a couple of years ago due to a "one-in-a-million" occurrences with her heart. The thought of going on and living life without her was unbearable! So, I want to emphasize again that I AM NOT criticizing anyone that is struggling with moving on after such a tragic event.
However, please hear me as I say this with complete compassion and caring - this, as well, does not have to define the rest of your life. Will it always be there? YES! Will it forever impact every area of your life for the rest of your life? YES! But it does not have to define and control the rest of your life.
You've often heard it said that the person that has passed would want you to go on and LIVE your life! I'm guessing that this is true but hard for us to think about when we go through such things. Please hear this in the way it is intended...at some point in time we must CEASE living the life of a victim and begin to live the life of a VICTOR!
You can. You must.
I, along with many others, am here to help in any way that I can by doing all I can to encourage you with these positive podcasts and articles. It IS possible to survive and thrive in spite of any bad thing that may have happened in your life.
When bad things happen they DO NOT have to define your life.
Join me tomorrow as we continue on with the next part, "LET IT DESTROY YOU". Until then, be sure to...
"Make it an AWESOME day! (Who else is going to do it for you?)"
Mike
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