Your "Circle" Matters

As always, be sure to go back and read the previous 2 articles that go along with this one. Why? Because they form a "mini-series" and today's blog article is the last of this 3-part series. You need to be caught up/up to date on the thoughts that have preceded this article to get the most out of the series.

 

I want to start this one off sharing something that I saw on another commercial. As part of the commercial script, the lady says something along the lines of:   "It's important to surround yourself with the right people."

Now, I already knew this but it was a good "memory jogger" that made me decide to do a blog article/podcast on that truth.

You've probably heard it said many times that we are most like the 5 people with which we spend the most time. When you think about that idea it might SCARE YOU or it may ENCOURAGE YOU. Which is it for you? Do you WANT to be like those people in your "circle"?  

By the way, this is often referred to as your "circle of influence". That's a great description because that's exactly what it is!

When it's stated that you are most "like" those people it means that you are influenced by those people in EVERY area of your life to the point that you "mimic" their thoughts and attitudes and, yes, even their ACTIONS in your own life. Give that some SERIOUS thought, friend!

You tend to adapt the same mindset and attitude with your...Finances, Physical Fitness, How you Present Yourself Physically (and every other way) and even your mindset and attitude with your relationships (spouse, friends, co-workers, etc.). 

 

This "circle" also shapes your thoughts on living a FULL life without regrets (the previous two articles).

So, yeah, YOUR "CIRCLE" MATTERS!

 What influence do YOU have on YOUR "circle"? If you take a look at your circle and decide it's not what you need in your life, you can do one of two things: change your circle or, through your influence you can try to CHANGE the mindset and attitude of those in that circle. 

Maybe YOU are the CHANGE that your circle needs. Perhaps YOU are the one that, through your own mindset and focus, can help change the way your "circle" talks, acts and even thinks. Notice this list of things that Paul encourages the Christians in the city of Philippi to think about and focus on as a way to encourage each other (their "circle").

 Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things.  (Philippians 4:8)

In the last article I also referred to what the writer of the book (letter) of Hebrews encourage the group there to do as a way to help strengthen each other while going through a lot of struggles... "but exhort (we, today, would use the word "encourage") one another daily, while it is called “Today,” (Hebrews 3:13)

Here's another section where the same writer passes this advice on to the same group of people on how to continue with this daily encouragement..."And let us consider one another in order to stir up love and  good works, not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as is the manner of some, but exhorting (encouraging) one another, and so much the more as you see the Day approaching." (Hebrews 10:24-25) 

The phrase, "stir up" is often used in a negative way. Usually it's something that is bad (and often intentional) and may be used in phrases such as, "Wow, you sure stirred up a hornet's nest!" If you know anything about hornets then you KNOW that that is NOT a good thing! Yikes!

However, in this section of scripture from the Bible, that phrase is used in the opposite way. The advice given is to "stir up" GOOD things such as love, good works (good activity, activity that brings about good/positive results), not "skipping out" on spending time together as a way of encouraging each other.

Now listen, sometimes you have to just understand that your actions may not impact those in your current "circle" the way you need. Take a look at what is said in this graphic...

So, yeah, sometimes you will need to actually CHANGE the people with which you spend your time. Oh, believe me, I understand that this might be very difficult and, at times, may be even seemingly impossible, depending on who that person(s) may be.

But, keep this in mind. If YOU start living your life the way that the above Scriptures suggest then, guess what? YOUR mindset and attitude will improve in such away that you will begin to ATTRACT the "right  kind" of people that will also have the same approach. What will you have then? A "circle of friends" that will encourage you and spur you on just as you will be doing for them. 

So, just in case you haven't quite caught on to this truth, let me leave you with one more graphic using the thoughts found in 1 Corinthians 15:33..."Do not be deceived (don't fool yourself!), bad company corrupts good morals."

You may want to listen in on the podcast to catch some of my "Southern Expressions" that express this same thought. You might get a kick out of it! 

To sum this "mini-series" up: In order to live your life FULL and to die EMPTY (with NO regrets) then you must understand the importance of living TODAY to the best of your ability. One major way to do that is to surround yourself with people that will strengthen and encourage you each and every day. Carefully choose and develop your "circle" to be challenged to live in a way to get the MOST out of your life. 

Until next time, remember...

YOU'RE HERE FOR A REASON and, whatever you do, always be sure to...

"Make it an AWESOME day! (Who else is going to do it for you?)"

Mike

Future You University   FYU on Facebook!   Podcast on iTunes   Podcast RSS feed

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Project 141: RELAIONSHIPS (Part 3: Family, Friends, CoWorkers)

 

So, you should already know what I'm about to say as you get ready to read this article...have you already read parts 1 and 2? If not, go do that first. If you have, then welcome to part 3!

And, while you are at it, be sure to check out the podcast by clicking HERE.

In this article we are going to look at our "Project 141" expansion application to the area of relationships and, more specifically, your relationships with family, friends, coworkers and even your boss. Yep. Even your boss.

I'm also going to use the exact same graphic that I used in part 1 of this section when I discussed your relationship with your spouse/mate. Here it is:

 Here's the kicker, friend...THESE 3 QUESTIONS can be (should be) applied (considered and acted upon) to ANY relationship that you value. Yes, even your relationships with your coworkers and your boss.  "Wait a minute, Mike, I wouldn't say that I 'value' my relationships with my coworkers and, for sure, I'm not sure I'd say that about my boss!"

Let's think about that for a moment. When you go back and reconsider the importance of guarding and protecting your mind (personal development) and, along with that, you throw into the mix a group of people that you likely spend more time with than anyone else...shouldn't you "value" that relationship to the point of at least wanting to make them the best possible? Do you REALLY want to "add on" to the negativity that wants to consume you ever day as it is?

And, when you consider that your "boss" or manager or whoever it is that is in a position to promote you or fire you, is a part of your "work life", wouldn't it make sense to try to make that relationship as positive and productive as possible?

I've shared this example before but I feel it needs to be shared again in this discussion. Years ago my wife went to work for a store and was warned on her first day to "stay clear" of the assistant manager because she was grouchy and negative. Yes, on day one. Little did those that said those things know that, for my wife, they simply presented a challenge for her. Her thought was, "I'm going to do whatever I have to do to make her (the assistant manager) smile each day that I'm here at work". 

And, take a wild guess what happened...she accomplished her goal of putting a smile on that assistant managers face every day that my wife worked with her. No, it was not an immediate change but, day after day, when my wife would say something positive to her with a HUGE smile on her face, the assistant manager had no choice but to smile back with a positive response. And that's not all. To the shock of all of her coworkers (who were already in shock at what all had happened), this assistant manager hand-knitted a "blanket or throw" for her and told her how much she appreciated her. 

WOW! Talk about my wife doing something DAILY to improve her relationship with this assistant manager. What an incredible change!

I'm not telling you that this will always be the type of reaction that you can expect but, at the same time, I can pretty much promise you that there WILL be some positive change and improvement in that relationship.

So again, regardless of whether you are talking about friends, family, coworkers or, yes, even your "boss" it is important to apply these same 3 questions on a DAILY basis:

     1. What do I do TODAY to IMPROVE this relationship?

     2. What do I do TODAY to BE INVOLVED in this relationship?

     3 What do I do TODAY to make ______________ glad that they are a part of this relationship?

Notice that, in all 3 of these questions, the question is NOT, "What do THEY do..." but, rather, "What do I do". This is a key ingredient in this "exercise" - this must be turned "inward" and applied to YOU taking the action and not waiting on the other person and/or blaming the other person. That is about what YOU need to do and what YOU need to do TODAY.

1. How do you improve or "make better" your relationship with your friends, family, coworkers and your boss/employer? How can you be a better friend, family member, coworker and employee?

2. What do you need to do to make sure you are "involved" (engaged) in these same relationships? For example, at work, are you there just to "get the check" or are you involved/engaged in a way that shows you are dedicated to doing your absolute best at whatever your position may be there. Are you one that constantly whines and complains or are you one that, again, is focused on "turning off" the negativity that surrounds them and is focused on doing their job to the best of their ability?

3. What do you do TODAY to make (fill in the blank) GLAD that they are a part of this relationship with you? Are your friends - especially your really close friends - GLAD that you are their friend? Are you "involved and engaged" in that friendship or are you only "connected" when you want/need something? What are the "needs" that your family has at this stage of your life. Are you fully engaged in whatever role that might be and are they glad that you are a part of your family? And, yes, even with your coworkers and your "boss"...do they like to see you come into a room or are they happier when you leave? Is your employer GLAD that they hired you or do they regret that move?

Do NOT take the power behind these 3 questions lightly! They ARE, indeed, POWERFUL but only if you take them seriously and honestly answer and  apply what you need to do.

Until next time, remember, YOU'RE HERE FOR A REASON and, whatever you do, always be sure to...

"Make it an AWESOME day! (Who else is going to do it for you?)"

Mike

Future You University   FYU on Facebook!   Podcast on iTunes   Podcast RSS feed

YouTube  Project141

Stop Trying to Fit In

Why do so many try to "fit in"? Why do so many try to be like someone else, instead of being themselves? I'm sure there are many different answers to those questions and you, yourself, may have struggled with this very thing in your life.

But, let me ask another questions: Why try to be like someone else when YOU are the ONLY YOU in existence? YOU are UNIQUE and there is no one else like you - never has been and never will be!

I do understand wanting to emulate - or copy - some favorable characteristics that some have. We all need mentors or those that we look up to as a good example. I get that. I understand that and I support that. 

HOWEVER, that does not mean that you should give up who you are in order to "be like" someone else. Make sense?

The fact that you are UNIQUE (and you are!) supports what the graphic above states...you were BORN to STAND OUT!

Now listen, let's use a little common sense here, o.k.? Yeah, I know...sometimes common sense ain't so common but, still, help me out here. Obviously, if you are a mean spirited jerk to everyone around you then, friend, you need to STOP being "that" version of you and do all that you can to become a better you and the BEST you that you can be!

We ALL should be striving to do that in our lives and for the impact that we have on those around us. That's the whole purpose of "personal development", right? That's my whole purpose in what I have done over the past 11 years through Future You University...to help each of us to be a better "future version" of ourselves than we are now.

Again, you are unique and there is no one else like you. You have certain gifts, talents and abilities that only YOU bring to the table of life. 

That being said, stop trying to fit in when you were BORN to "stand out"!

Please be sure to check out the podcast and the video that goes along with today's topic. You can find the links below. 

Until next time, whatever you do, always be sure to...

"Make it an AWESOME day! (Who else is going to do it for you?)"

Mike

Future You University   FYU on Facebook!   Podcast on iTunes   Podcast RSS feed

YouTube   Live Debt Free!

Cherish Your Relationships

Today, January 26, 2020, the world learned of the unexpected death of sports legend, Kobe Bryant and his young daughter, Gigi in a helicopter crash. Several others also lost their lives in the crash.

Due to his celebrity status the news of this tragic loss is being discussed by many on several different television outlets as well as radio and social media. This blog article is proof of that very point. I also plan to do a short podcast as well.

Here's my simple point that I'd like to make: ALL of our relationships are precious in their own ways and we should NEVER take them for granted. However, we do just that, don't we? We become used to those people always being there and we just don't even think about the possibility of talking to them one morning and then having them gone just a few hours later. Never to return.

I want to encourage you to do all that you can to get in the habit of appreciating the relationships that you have in your life and, at the same time, expressing that appreciation to those that make up the relationships in your life. Some are closer than others and they all have different "feelings" connected to them. 

Whether it is telling someone how much you value and appreciate their friendship or telling someone that you love them, get in the habit of doing just that.

Life is too short and the future is never promised. Take the time today to say what needs to be said. Take advantage as soon as you get the opportunity and, perhaps, MAKE the opportunity because friend, you just never know.

Thank you for being a part of my life -

Mike Spillman

Future You University   FYU on Facebook!   Podcast on iTunes   Podcast RSS feed

YouTube   Live Debt Free!

What Do YOU Want?

 * Be sure to listen to the podcast and also watch the video on this same topic!*

Seems like a simple enough question, right? Yet, not many people can actually ANSWER that question. Don't get me wrong, a lot of people will give an answer to that question very quickly but it will likely be an answer that is very vague and generic.

For example, to say, "I want to make more money!" is a very vague answer.  For one, how much is "more"? Another may say, "I want a better job!". Again, what is "better"? What are the things that would make a job "better" for you than what you do now?

Perhaps a better question to ask about ANY such thing is to ask "Why" as well as, "How bad do you want it?".

We'll get back to that in a moment but, bottom line, ANY change in your life, like even these that are being briefly discussed, will require you to answer that one question up front: "How bad do you want it?"
 

May I be blunt? Regret SUCKS! The way I look at the definition of the word, "regret" is that fact that you cannot go back and do anything about it! It's too late, hence the real regret.

Yes, change - ANY change - is hard but at least the difficulty that comes with that change indicates that you can, and are, actually striving to DO something about it. Regret? It's too late.

So, again, what do you want to do - and why? Do you even know? In the last article I posted a graphic and talked briefly about your "vision" (for what you want to do) becoming clear once you approach this from your heart. That becomes the answer to the question, "Why?" as well.

That's why I ask you to answer the question, "Why?" in all of this. What is your heart telling you about what you really want to accomplish? What does your heart tell you about your PASSION for your life? Many times we forget to talk about "passion" because of the reality of "having to pay the  bills" and often just settling for whatever we can do.

But, often, when we KNOW what our passion is and what it is that we actually DO want to do with and in our lives, the temporary "discomfort" of such a job begins to lessen. Why? Because we know that it may be the "vehicle" that we need to get us to what we really want to do and accomplish in and with our lives.

I have a "goal" or "passion" of something that I want to accomplish in my life. It's been the same thing for many years and I've yet to really get much closer to it than I have been in the past. Believe me, there is ALREADY some regret attached to that fact BUT the good news is that it is NOT too late for me to do something about it! Here's the thing: I have found what I believe to be the "ultimate tool" to accomplish that task but it will require a financial investment that I am unable to fulfill at this time. BUT GUESS WHAT? I also know that my current job WILL provide me the "vehicle" to get to where I want to be as long as I am willing and determined to do my best and become my best in this area.

A "half effort" likely won't even get me "half-way" there. I must be determined to make the necessary changes and break some old habits in order to make this push in my life. So, if it is something I REALLY want to accomplish, then I must make the necessary changes regardless of how difficult and, yes, even "painful" the journey may be.

Yes, every single day! This is what I talked about right before the start of the new year when I challenged you to think about "Happy New DAY!" as opposed to "Happy New Year". Why? Because it is EASIER to check our progress - or lack of it - at the end of a day as opposed to trying to track our course over the course of a whole year.

Yeah, what if I (you) struggle? THAT'S A GOOD THING because, like I mentioned above, it helps us to KNOW that we are actually doing something that is not our same old habit from before!

Do you want to know how to avoid that struggle? QUIT.  That's right...give up and quit. But, guess what you will have to deal with then that is worse than the struggle of change? REGRET.

It's your choice.

 

 Oh, and one more thing. "Don't water your weeds". Don't feed the negativity in your life and don't "give life" to those things and/or people in your life that will continue to try to choke out your dreams and your goals. And, yes, that may mean that you need to separate yourself from some PEOPLE in your life that currently occupies some of your daily time. If it's a spouse or someone else in your own household then you - YOU - must figure out some way to avoid such a situation. Perhaps you need to stop sharing your thoughts and goals with such people. If possible (easier said than done) you may have to actually "cut" some of these people completely out of your life. 

That's right, you may have to go a step further than just not "watering" your weeds, you may actually have to actively WEED YOUR GARDEN. 

Feel free to contact me: mike@futureyouuniversity.com to discuss this further if you'd like.

So, really...what do YOU want and how bad do you want it? Get focused - get LASER focused - on this part of the journey. You will find it hard, if not impossible, to move forward at all until you do.

Join me Sunday nights at 6:00 p.m. CST at www.Facebook.com/FutureYouUniversity for my weekly LIVE streaming event and, until next time, whatever you do, always be sure to...

"Make it an AWESOME day! (Who else is going to do it for you?)"

Mike

Future You University   FYU on Facebook!   Podcast on iTunes   Podcast RSS feed

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"Misteltoe"

I'm assuming that, as you read this, you are aware and familiar with the tradition that goes along with the mistletoe plant. If not, here's a very quick synopsis: The folklore is that if you stand under a piece of mistletoe with someone, then the two must kiss. There is mistletoe that is hung where two can either purposely stand underneath or even do so accidentally.  Some people may also carry a piece of mistletoe with them and hold it over the head of someone that they would like to kiss. 

And, for whatever reason it seems to be  a part of Christmas traditions, at least in the United States. 

Now, like I state in the podcast, I'm not suggesting that you become a "kissing bandit" with what I'm about to say. Got it? 😏

Here is what I AM saying. Being reminded by the thought of mistletoe and the tradition that surrounds it, DO NOT wait until "special occasions" to tell those that you love, that you do. Don't wait for some "special occasion" to let someone know that you care.

Friend, time goes by quickly and, every day, there are those that regret the fact that they waited...and waited...and waited and then they waited too late. Many stand by the graves of those that they had planned to tell them how much they were loved. But, for whatever reason, they waited too long. 

So, that's it in a nutshell. Short and to the point.

Open up your heart - and your mouth - and share your love with those around you.

You'll be glad you did. (And so will they). 

Join me next time and, until then, whatever you do...

"Make it an AWESOME day! (Who else is going to do it for you?)"

Mike

Future You University   FYU on Facebook!   Podcast on iTunes   Podcast RSS feed

Do More Of...

Now, before I really get into the "meat" of this article, I feel that I need to do a little "disclaimer" on this - right here and right now.

You can't ALWAYS do "what makes you happy", nor should you. I know, I know. It sounds like I'm already talking just the opposite of what the title infers, but I'm not. 

We cannot live a life that is oblivious to those that are around us. We cannot live a life that is totally focused on SELF, though it seems that many in our world have and are attempting to do just that. 

One area that I really focus on with this is if you have children at home. I cringe when I hear someone say - while still having children at home (specifically younger children) - "It's MY time now! It's time for ME to take care of ME!"

I understand the feeling that may come at times but, friend, as long as you have those children at home  you have the responsibility to teach them, train them and raise them to be good, productive humans themselves.

Oh, I understand that it is not always easy and I know that it can get stressful and frustrating at times. But it IS a responsibility that you must fulfill. 

I hope this makes sense. I hope you understand WHAT I'm saying as well as WHY I'm saying it.

Here's another example: Someone may say that having more money than they know what to do with would make them happy. Cool. However, that same person CANNOT steal that money from everyone around them in order to make them happy.

Get it? Good!

Maybe we have all forgotten how to find the "little" things that can make us happy. Or, maybe we just have allowed ourselves to become so "busy" that we just have lost sight of those things that are around us every day that make us happy.

WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY?

Being surrounded by your children? Your grandchildren? A quiet house? Time away? A walk? Reading? Traveling? Time with friends? Going to live events such as concerts or sporting events?

I don't know what it is for you, but remind yourself what it is that makes you happy. And then, if situations allow, DO MORE OF THAT!

Sure, even as a parent, there are ways that you can find and enjoy those quiet times and find some "alone time" in a way that will not neglect your family. You may have to get help from a spouse or a friend. You may simply have to steal those moments away as they come and not let them slip by.  But it CAN be done!

So many times people will say, "I'm just too busy! I can't find time to do those things that make me happy!". When, in reality, we have allowed ourselves to fill our lives up with "busy-work" that is not really necessary. Make sense?

When it gets down to it, we're often not as busy as we like to think, we're just not disciplined enough to prioritize things in our life and even allow some things to just simply go undone. 

When my three boys were at home, I LOVED being a Dad! I absolutely loved it, even when they became teens and there were the normal "issues" that come along with helping them develop. No, it wasn't always easy. Yes, there were times that I felt I was at my wits end. But, still...I loved being a Dad and I really miss those times. If you wish for a quiet house, be careful what you wish for. It WILL come and, often (like me), when it does, you wish it weren't so quiet.  

Now I get to enjoy being "Poppa" (grandpa) and I absolutely LOVE every time I get to spend a day or two with my "babies" when they come to visit. 

So, again, what is it for you? 

Listen to me...you need to find MORE than just one thing! For example, I love when my grandbabies come to visit but I cannot allow THAT to be the ONLY time that I find something happy! Know what I mean? It's up to me to find joy and happiness in things that take place EVERY single day.

Here's the kicker: Maybe instead of trying to FIND something that will make me happy, perhaps I can focus on DOING something that will bring happiness to someone else and - guess what? - in return I will likely find happiness myself. 

That's usually the way it works, friend. 

So, in the midst of "doing more of what makes you happy", perhaps more happiness will come when you do more to bring happiness to others. 

Think about it and, until next time, whatever you do...

"Make it an AWESOME day! (Who else is going to do it for you?)"

Mike

Future You University   FYU on Facebook!   Podcast on iTunes   Podcast RSS feed

Be SO Positive That...

From time to time I'll have people say to me, "Mike, I understand the importance of being positive but I just don't know how to do that when I'm surrounded by so much negativity!"

Anyone else relate to that? I DO!

First of all, let me ask you this: WHERE IS YOUR FOCUS? Let me explain what I mean.

Have you ever bought a certain "brand" of automobile and then, all of a sudden (so it seems), you notice how many other cars of this same brand are on the road? All of a sudden (so it seems), they are EVERYWHERE! 

The fact is, there are no more of these particular brands of automobile than there were before, but your FOCUS has changed to the point that you now NOTICE them more than before.

Does that example make sense? Now let me explain how that connects to the negativity that surrounds us each and every day.

I don't deny the fact that there are many negative people around us. Seriously, they seem (at times) to be EVERYWHERE! This becomes increasingly difficult if you find that a lot of that negativity comes from others under your own roof (from those in your family). 

But, do you think it's possible to change our focus to where, even though that negativity still exists, we don't notice it as much as we once did but, instead, we begin to notice that - HEY - there are also a lot of POSITIVE attitudes around us?

Now, I can't tell you whether you think it's possible or not, but I CAN tell you that it IS possible to change your FOCUS to where you begin to notice the POSITIVE more than you do the negative.

(By the way, this article is really very different than the podcast that I have on this same topic. So, you need to be sure to listen to it by clicking HERE or by clicking HERE.)  

 And, friend, the way that it begins is by doing exactly what you are doing right this very moment. That's right! Continue to immerse yourself with as much positive information as possible and you will soon find that you are drawn to (and others are drawn to you) others with the same positive attitude as you. This will help you focus on the POSITIVE and pay less attention to the negative. 

Listen, there are many others out there JUST LIKE YOU! That's right, there are many others that are seeking to increase the positive influence in their own life and they are looking for YOU! And then, guess what? When there are two of you combining "forces" you will find that you will attract others as a result.

Will you rid your life of all negativity. NO.

But, you WILL begin to focus less on the negativity around you and it will have less and less effect on you and your life. 

I want you to pay close attention to this FACT: It is IMPOSSIBLE for a positive attitude and a negative attitude to co-exist. One will "win out" over the other, sooner or later. 

So, if you are in a situation where those close to you (spouse, family, close friend) have a negative attitude, DO NOT GIVE UP! Surround yourself with other positive people (like I describe above) and continue to immerse yourself with positive information (like you're doing now and like you will do when you listen to the podcast) and, if you stick with it, you will begin to see that YOUR positive influence will begin to "snuff out" the negative influences around you. 

Easier said than done? YOU BET!

But it CAN be done and YOU CAN DO IT, friend!

I'd love to connect with you and encourage you directly so please feel free to connect with me via my fan page on Facebook by CLICKING HERE. 

Again, whatever you do, DO NOT GIVE UP! There are many that are waiting for YOUR positive influence to impact their lives in a powerful way. And, you will likely never know how many people you touched and whose lives you helped change for the better!

Be sure to check back for my next article coming soon. Until then, whatever you do, always be sure to...

"Make it an AWESOME day! (Who else is going to do it for you?)"

Mike

Future You University   FYU on Facebook!   Podcast on iTunes   Podcast RSS feed

What (or Who) Decides or Sways Your Vote?

Although this series is NOT about politics I do want to start today's discussion by asking a political question: Why do you vote the way that you do in an election?

Many times, a person votes due to "family history" and influence. As a matter of fact, some people won't even tell their parents (or other family members) how they vote (or they lie about it) because they don't want to have a big "political argument" about their choice. Sometimes it's due to religious values. 

There are may different reasons that a person votes the way that they do in a political election. What about you? Why do you vote the way that you do?

In much the same way, there are many reasons as to why we "vote" the way that we do about the direction of our lives. (If you haven't done so, go back and read the last two articles that leads up to this one...they all "build" on each other). 

Some people choose the direction of their life because of the way that they were raised or due to other family expectations. Some don't put much thought or value on the direction of their own lives and future because that is what they have seen in the lives of their own parents. On the other side of the spectrum are those that are pressured into following a particular path of study or career choice because that is what their parents want or expect from them. 

Just as there are many different reasons for why people vote the way that they do in an election, so are there many different reasons for why people "vote" the way that they do concerning the direction of their life. 

What about you?

You've likely heard the idea that you are the "average" of the 5 - 10 people with whom you spend the most time. When I say that you are the "average", I'm talking about in every area of your life. That's right. You tend to fit into the average, financially, of those that you hang around with as well as spiritually, career-wise, family guidelines (discipline, etc.) and anything else you can think of. This even goes down to what kind of vehicle that you drive!

What's that old saying? "Birds of a feather flock together." 

Wow, when you actually look at this closely, you may be surprised by these things. You may decide that you need to change who it is that you hang out with or, you may discover that you LIKE the influence that these people have on and for your life.

The key thing in this is the fact that YOU HAVE A CHOICE or a VOTE!

One of the most important questions we can ask ourselves is, "WHY?". In any area of our life and in EVERY area of our life we should stop and ask ourselves this question from time to time. "WHY am I doing what I'm doing in this particular area?" This, in essence, is how you will find out WHY you "vote" the way that you do concerning your life and the direction of your life. 

This is actually the very basis or foundation of this process. Every area of your life and the decisions that you make in those areas are "votes" that you cast about your life and your future as well as the future of your family. With that being said, don't you think it might be important to really know WHY you make those decisions? 

They are ALL important decisions because they ALL play a role in the direction of your life.  Do you think I'm being a bit over-dramatic with that last statement? I can hear some of you saying, "Oh come on, Mike. Me choosing where we eat supper tonight is not that big of a decision in the overall picture." I hear you, but it may be a bigger deal than you realize. Especially when you really examine WHY you made the choice that you made. And, especially when you really examine what thought you have put into that decision as far as how it impacts other areas of your life...such as financial. That's just an example but, friend, most people have no idea how much money they actually spend on eating out and other "extras" while they complain about never having enough money. 

Yes, it is your life. Absolutely. That's the whole point, friend. It is YOUR life and your life will go where YOU lead it and direct it to go. And, all of that happens with the votes that you cast on a daily basis. 

Let me end with this. There's no reason to drive yourself crazy for the rest of your life thinking about every little thing in your life. You may need to examine it all closely for a period of time. However, once you discover your focus and purpose for your life, you will then act "automatically" based on that focus and purpose. Yes, you will still need to do a "check up" from time to time to make sure you haven't wandered off course too far, but it will become a natural part of your life.

Either way, your daily "vote" counts and the impact of those votes are likely greater than you and I realize, friend!

This article is one of those situations that I talk about on the podcast where I encourage you to listen to the podcast as well as read the article because they are not exactly the same. They are not done at the same time and I don't follow a script. THIS ARTICLE is a lot different than the podcast that I recorded for this topic. So, please, read the following couple of paragraphs carefully and take the time to listen to the podcast as well. 

So, if you haven't done so yet, you need to listen to the podcast on today's topic. Just click one of the links at the bottom of this article to do so. There is SO MUCH MORE information and additional thoughts that I share with you there that is not found in this article. 

If you listen by going to iTunes, please take a moment and leave a review - I thank you in advance! Also, be sure to stop by the FYU fan page on Facebook and let me know that you left that review AND to just say "hello" and let me know that you are benefiting from Future You University. 

As always, THANKS for joining me today and, please, share this with as many as possible and always be sure to keep moving forward, closer to your dream!

And, until next time, whatever you do,  be sure to...

"Make it an AWESOME day! (Who else is going to do it for you?)"

Mike

Future You University   FYU on Facebook!   Podcast on iTunes   Podcast RSS feed

Finding Your PURPOSE

"Find & Keep/Protect Our JOY & PURPOSE For Our Lives"

(Share & Teach Family and Others!) - PART 2 

 Back in August of 2010, my wife suffered a heart attack and had to be "shocked" back to life on two different occasions. This was not a normal event - my wife was not overweight and did not suffer from any type of high cholesterol or anything like that. It was literally a 1 in 1 million incident that happened. And, she survived and is doing well. 

However, after returning home from the hospital and still being in a very emotional state (which is normal following an event such as this) she would discuss with me how she felt that God had kept her here for a reason. The struggle she was having was that she could not figure out what the reason - or the PURPOSE - was for her life now. Through our discussions I found that she was searching for some BIG and tremendous "something" that she needed to do.

I shared with her that, perhaps, the "reason" that God kept her here was that I and the rest of her family NEEDED her to be here! I suggested that, perhaps, her "purpose" was to still be there for us because she was so important to "our world". 

You see, friend, I believe that THIS is the key to our search for our "purpose" for our lives. That key is the impact or importance that we have upon "our world". 

Think about it.

Yes, many desire to be known by people all over the world and, quite honestly, they are not truly "known" by those closest to them, including their own children. I'm not saying that this is always the case but we have seen it far too often in our world. And, YES, we NEED people to step out and lead and challenge and encourage us but, perhaps, at the same time, the TIMING needs to be adjusted.

Just a thought.

But, again, here's what I believe is the key for all of us as we contemplate our "purpose" in and for our lives...what is your impact and importance upon YOUR world?

Join me for a moment as we peel back the layers that make up "our world" beginning with those closest to us. Perhaps visualize this like the ripples on the water after tossing a pebble into the pond or creek.

First of all, it begins with your immediate family. This could be your spouse and your kids or, it may be your brothers, sisters and your parents. Sometimes these are some of the most difficult relationships we have simply because we ARE so close to them and, often, because we spend so much time with them. But they are important and you DO have an impact upon them. If you DO have children at home, please do NOT overlook the importance that you have in and for their lives. This gets especially difficult (at times) when they go through their teen years! But it still holds true.

Then continue on to the level that includes your closest friends. Then your other friends that maybe don't fit into that "closest" category but they are still good friends. Then continue on out to your co-workers, neighbors and all of the other acquaintances that you have in your life. That "circle of friends" expands rather quickly, doesn't it?

Now then, with each of these level of relationships, think about how YOUR impact upon them may influence THEIR relationships on each of those different levels in their lives! WOW!

Think for a moment about how the way you treat those around you - good or bad - can be passed on and on and on through these relationships. That, my friend, is quite powerful to think about and, hopefully, as you think about it, it will also challenge you to be a positive influence along the way. 

And, from experience, I can tell you that you may never know how powerful that influence has been in someones life. Or, you may find out years later about the power and level of that influence.

In my opinion, here's the answer to the question, "What is my PURPOSE in and for my life?" To be the best YOU that you can be in and for "your world". 

That, my friend, is more powerful than you may ever know.

Again, as a reminder, if you haven't done so yet, you need to listen to the podcast on today's topic. Just click one of the links at the bottom of this article to do so. There is SO MUCH MORE information and additional thoughts that I share with you there that is not found in this article. 

If you listen by going to iTunes, please take a moment and leave a review - I thank you in advance! Also, be sure to stop by the FYU fan page on Facebook and let me know that you left that review AND to just say "hello" and let me know that you are benefiting from Future You University. 

As always, THANKS for joining me today and, please, share this with as many as possible and always be sure to keep moving forward, closer to your dream!

And, until next time, whatever you do,  be sure to...

"Make it an AWESOME day! (Who else is going to do it for you?)"

Mike

Future You University   FYU on Facebook!   Podcast on iTunes   Podcast RSS feed

Emotional Impact

Here we are at the start of another new series...this time I'll be talking about EMOTIONS and how they impact (effect) us as well as those around us.

Let me give you a little background as to how these thoughts came about for this series. A couple of weeks ago, while at church on a Sunday morning, the preacher said something along the lines of, "Your emotions tend to reflect the emotions of those you spend time with".

That was a little different than things I have heard in the past concerning "those you spend time with". I've shared with you several times about how I've heard that your financial situation will be the average of the 5 (or 10) people that you spend the most time with.

So, it would also make sense that those same people would influence your emotions as well, does it not?

Hey, let's get down to it here: WE ARE LIKE THOSE WE HANG AROUND!

Side note: How much influence do YOU have on THEM as opposed to THEM on YOU?

On that particular Sunday the preacher also shared the following scripture from Proverbs 13:20 - "Walk with the wise and become wise; associate with fools and get in trouble." (Holy Bible. New Living Translation)

Hey, isn't that just common sense? Think about it and, again, examine your close associates/friends. It really should cause us all to think carefully about that group of people!

At the same time, it's important for us to also consider the following question: "What "emotions" do YOU put/send out?" Hey listen, we all know that emotions have an impact on others...YOU'VE experienced it from others and you have also HAD THAT IMPACT on others.

We'll be discussing these things in more detail in the last two parts of this series, but I also want to leave you with one more thought to consider: "Do your emotions 'control or direct' your attitude OR does your attitude 'control or direct' your emotions?"

Whatever you do, don't use the excuse, "I'm an emotional person" to allow you to act in ways that are not productive or helpful that CAN be corrected and/or improved. That's too easy and it's also too easy to allow that to become an actual "belief" in our lives.'

HOMEWORK: Between now and the next installment, pay close attention to the emotions of those that you spend the most time with and then compare them to your own emotions. Notice how these people "react" to situations and then, again, compare to your own reactions.

You may be surprised at what you find.

Thanks for your time and I hope to see you here for the next part of this series. Until then, whatever you do, be sure to...

"Make it an AWESOME day! (Who else is going to do it for you?)"

Mike

Future You University    "Like" FYU on Facebook!
 

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Are the Best Things in Life REALLY Free?

 

There is an episode from the old "Andy Griffith Show" in which Barney Fife takes his girl, Thelma Lou, out on a date. However, for the date, he didn't actually take her "out" anywhere. Instead, he picked her up and took her down by the lake for some "smooching" time. As they were sitting in the car, Thelma Lou made some comment about wishing they had gone to a movie or done something different, to which Barney replied, "Well Thelma Lou, don't you know that the best things in life are free?".  Apparently this "free" date didn't qualify as one of the "best" things in life for Thelma Lou.

You've heard that phrase yourself, right? 

Look at the graphic above and you'll see it again. And, you'll also see little images to demonstrate what types of things fit into this "free" category. But, are they really "free"?

 

Don't get me wrong...I understand the thought behind the phrase and I agree that, too many times we feel that MONEY has to be involved in order to bring happiness. That is usually NOT the case.

 

But, again, I want to focus on asking the question about these particular things: "Are they REALLY free?"

 

As we go through this series this week, understand that there is no such thing as a free lunch! In other words, NOTHING is actually FREE, friend. And, yes, that includes hugs, smiles and friends.

 

All of the things that you see on the first graphic (and that we will be discussing this week) require an INVESTMENT from you in one way or another. That's right - it ain't free, buddy!

 

Think about it...do you really want a complete stranger coming up to you and giving you a hug out on the street? You might, but NOT ME! There has to be some sort of "connection" or relationship in order for me to give or receive a hug. Sure, it may be a joyous celebration at a sporting event that might cause such a thing to happen but, even at that, the excitement over that sporting event would be the "connecting" value.

 

You must INVEST YOURSELF in some sort of way in order for a hug to MEAN something and for it to be welcomed (on either side) for encouragement, solace or appreciation. Otherwise, they are just plain AWKWARD. You've experienced some of those, haven't you?

 

SMILES are a little different but, friend, they still require an investment from you. Sharing a smile is one of the easiest things that a person can do but, have you looked at the faces around you lately? There doesn't seem to be too many of them with a smile on their face!

 

You have to make an investment - a commitment - that you are going to share your positive attitude REGARDLESS of how many people ignore it because you just never know when you will come across someone that really NEEDS that smile on that day. Believe me (and I think you already know this), it DOES make a difference! Add to that smile a friendly (and genuine) greeting - especially at your workplace - and see what happens. I love doing that with the ladies in the office at my work. I love to smile and greet them with a genuine, "Good morning, ladies! How are you doing today?" and then watch their faces light up with smiles of their own as they respond in a very similar way.

 

And finally, FRIENDS. It doesn't take a genius to realize that having friends DEFINITELY takes an investment from all involved. Am I right?

 

Too many people whine and complain about not having any friends when they are not willing to invest in such a relationship. They want friends but don't care enough about others to reach outside of their own little world to allow others in. Or, many times, they just are too selfish to reach out and care about others.

 

YOU CAN'T HAVE IT BOTH WAYS.

 

Sure, some friends are closer than others. That's normal. That's expected. Those are likely the ones with which you have far more invested. Cherish those relationships!

 

So, you see, in reality, these things might be considered "free" but they ALL require an investment from YOU. But hey, that's what life is all about...each of us sharing our lives with those around us.

 

Aren't you glad?

 

Invest and fill your life with those hugs, smiles and friends and, until next time, whatever you do, be sure to...

 

"Make it an AWESOME day! (Who else is going to do it for you?)"

 

Mike

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